Red Hot Moon

Chapter 1: Devils Never Cry

The night air has a foul and musty stench. A demon must be nearby. Bayonetta, a powerful and coquettish Umbra witch, approaches an abandoned chapel with caution. Her eyes narrow at the damaged front doors. Clearly something forced its way through. She leaps high into the air, landing on the roof as an alternative route of getting inside. There's a gaping hole. She briefly looks down it, then stealthily drops through.

Inside she lands gracefully like a cat, making as little noise as possible.

Gurgle, gurgle, gurgle.

She hears the slight rumblings of the beast echoing throughout the halls in the distance. She continues stalking around, trying not to have the squeaky, wooden floors give her position. She fans the dust away from her face. She sees a cockroach scurry across the floor. Her eyes widen in fear but she doesn't make a peep. Bayonetta tightens her mouth and tiptoes pass by, hoping it doesn't scuttle off in her direction.

The groans of the demon get louder as Bayonetta looks over the banister. She sees the grotesque slug-like demon, with several wandering eye stocks giving. It's dripping with slime and smells god awful, like hot, damp garbage. Bayonetta readies Love is Blue to ambush it.

"This is the last time I let you cheat your way into going to your children's PT meeting Enzo," she grumbles.

Bayonetta hops onto the banisher in a crouching position then -- crash! Flying through the stained-glass windows down below, a white-haired man in a red duster! The slug demon roars, baring its three rows of razor sharp deep. Bayonetta watches from above. The man in red checks his pockets. He's looking for something.

"DAAAAAANTE!" roars the demon.

Bayonetta's ears perk up from the reveal of Dante's name.

"Tonight, must be your lucky night, buddy," says Dante. "I'm all outta salt."

"Cursed Son of Sparda! How could you have found meeeee!?"

Dante casually strolls up the demon, "I followed your trail. You seem to be covered in a little ... uh, nevermind."

The demon lunges for Dante and swallows him whole! Bayonetta gasps and leaps down to Dante's aid. She poses stylishly in front of it with her guns aimed at it.

"Didn't your mother teach you any manners? Eating a meal too fast can cause a stomachache."

"I got room for you too, witch!" it cackles.

It charges forward to consume Bayonetta but suddenly stops. It gives a blood curdling scream and then explodes into huge chunks of gloop. Bayonetta avoids the debris and sees Dante standing in the middle of the carcass with his back turned to her. He shakes the demon's remains off of him as best as he could. Dante hears the cocking of Bayonetta's pistols. He turns around.

"Well, hello there," he smiles.

"Back at you."

"Are you seriously trying to do this right now," he questions, slightly annoyed. "And with me? Ha, haven't I been through enough already?"

"You're no human. And certainly no Lumen," Bayonetta starts suspiciously. "What are you?"

Dante approaches her, "I can be whatever you want me to be, stilts."

Bayonetta opens fire!

Bang! Bang! Bang!

Dante draws Ebony and Ivory and keeps up with Bayonetta in the gun fight. They fly through the air! Exploding pews to splitters! Creating more holes in the ceiling! Blasting out small portions of the wall. They appear to be evenly matched. They lock arms.