She || Drastoria

25 - The Birthday Wish

On the morning of Scorpius's fifth birthday, Astoria collapsed.

It was a barely a thing, she told herself as she splashed water over her flushed face and looked into the mirror at her frighteningly gaunt reflection.

Just a little topple when she got out of the shower. It didn't matter that she'd connected her head on the edge of the sink or that there was a small pile of sick next to her face when she'd come to.

Incidents like this were bound to start happening, she just didn't want to make their son's special day about her.

"Darling," Draco said at once as she shakily walked back into the bedroom where he was sat up in bed; the covers fallen down around him, revealing his taut, toned abs. A frown flickered over his features. "Are you okay?"

"It's nothing, Draco," she whispered, perching shakily on the edge of the bed, reaching over to clasp his hand in hers. "Shall I wake Scorpius? He'll be excited to remember it's his birthday."

He looked at her carefully then, his eyes searching her as though trying to read her.

"When I was younger," he said quietly, the way in which he looked at her making her heart still, "I said something I can never take back. It was cruel and nasty and probably one of my worst regrets."

"I'm not being funny, but I'm pretty sure there's a whole list of things in which you said that could be construed as cruel." Astoria said, attempting to sound light hearted but her voice coming out perhaps a little sharper than she'd intended.

"I didn't think much of it at the time," Draco continued, "was perhaps rather proud out of it, if I'm to be brutally honest."

"Draco, why are you telling me this? You know I understand that things were different for you back then, that you have since learnt a lot about life and people and have changed. I wouldn't have married you otherwise."

"Because I keep asking myself if there is some kind of karma at play, and it's eating me up the more I think about it."

"Tell me." Astoria whispered.

"It was the start of sixth year and Potter had already done something to rile me up. It's not important what, but he had made me so furious, Astoria, you need to understand that. I was going through some shit, Father was in prison and well..." he glanced down at the faded ink on his left arm and Astoria instantly understood.

"Anyway," he continued, quickly shrugging it off. "The point is despite all that, it doesn't excuse what I said to him. And I can't take it back... ever."

"Draco, what did you say?"

"Don't hate me."

"You know I could never."

"I ridiculed him for his mother being dead, Astoria. I stood there and used the fact that he was just a baby when his mother had died against him. And then... I- I stamped on his face, except now when I recall that incident, it's no longer Potter's face I see beneath my shoe... it's Scorp's."

His voice instantly cracked; choking on the last word, his stomach caving as he doubled over.

The proceeding sobs that escaped his lips were nothing short of frightening. Astoria had never heard anything like it. She crawled immediately across the mattress and cradled his racking body into her arms.

"This is not your fault," she assured him, ardently kissing the top of his head, "what you did back then... you can't let yourself think that it caused this."

"I can't bear the thought of our little boy being without his mother." He wept as he clung tightly to her, his strangled voice so full of pain that it literally tore Astoria's heart. "I can't bear the thought of being without you."