Crashing Hard

Me and You ~ 24

I wonder if he's dead. I haven't heard back from the police or hospital. Maybe I should go check and see. Maybe not. Maybe. Do I really need to? I don't think I will and hopefully they'll never call me about him. I'm my mind he's dead and always will be. I need to move on from it. My son and those girls will need me to be at 100% and I don't want to let them down. Even though I have help I can't depend on them for everything.

" Iliza your tossing and turning is making it hard for me to sleep."

I forgot he was even in here. I didn't even realize I was moving around.

"Sorry Jong."

"Tell me what you're thinking about"

"Um if he's really dead and about the kids"

"First off he is really dead." I gasped loudly. How would he know?

"H-how do you know?"

"I have connections Iliza so don't worry about him"

"Are you sure? Promise me"

"What do I need fo promise for I told you he's dead"

"Please"

"I promise. Now what else are you thinking about"

"I don't want to depend on everyone's help with the kids" I know I'll need help but I don't want to depend on other people all the time.

"Okay I will help you with the kids"

Didn't I just tell him I don't want to depend on anyone.

"No. No you won't because I don't want to depend on you for help"

Is he not listening?As much as I would loooooove someone to help me I just don't want to burden anyone.

" I want to help you. In all honesty I want to help you with them."

Why would he want to help me? He could go off and have a life of his own and be happy, but here he is taking care of me. He could have his own happy little family or life wherever he wanted to and yet he was here trying to care for me.

"You can have your own happy life wherever you wanted to. So why are you here trying to help me?"

I just want him to be honest about this. I want him to be honest about his feelings with all of this. I know I shouldn't but I like him. I just got out of a terrible relationship and I have kids I have to take care of and I don't want to drag him into this life.

"If I'm being honest it's because no one else here will understand you like I do. No one will truly understand how you feel or what you're thinking like I do. I don't want to help you I need to. I have this uncontrollable feeling. And maybe I have a few feelings for you." He whispered the last part to me. Maybe he thought I wouldn't hear it but I did. My heart is pounding.

He likes us.

How do I tell him I like him too. How do I explain feelings I shouldn't even have.

"Oh...Um"

JUST TELL HIM

"I umm" How do I say this to him.

He rolled over on his stomach and stared at me. I wanted to kiss him. Maybe he wanted to also. I couldn't help but look at his lips and I tried to think of say how I feel. Seeing him like this made my stomach have little butterflies.

"I already know how you feel. I told you I understand you better than anyone else will."

How did he know?! Did I look that desperate?

I just stared back at him. Trying not to look at his lips. We just stared into each other's eyes. What are we supposed to do with this information about each other? Can we even pursue a relationship?

"I don't want to rush you into a new relationship. I want you to take your time and when you are ready and willing maybe we can pursue something"

" I would like that" I'm so relieved because I couldn't even imagine trying to start something again.

"I will help you with the kids and with your health. Mentally, physically, and emotionally. Whatever it takes for you to be happy again."

I want to cry, but I don't want to seem weak. I'm glad he will help me. I'm glad he understands me and everything I need. I just hope it ends up well and not like my last relationship. Although I don't think he would ever do something like that to me.

"Can we sleep now? We still have a lot of things we should do tomorrow." He is right I want to see the kids tomorrow so we should actually sleep.

"Yes, goodnight officially" I giggled I'm kind of funny.

"Goodnight officially Iliza."

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Short chapter. I hope you guys enjoyed.

I finally graduated high school. I enjoyed myself. I hope you guys are all doing well.

Remember even if you think no one cares about you just know I do. Many people would be hurt from your absence even if they don't always express it to you.

Bye guys.