understatement
She didn't want to like him, but after that it was damn hard not to. When she told Julian, he agreed. He said that made Damous a good man and a good royal guard, but that didn't make him his mate.
All true.
But what if he was?
To stop herself from thinking about it, she went to the Stage and spent the night singing away her blues. Tonight, there was a crowd and Brady talked her into singing her goodbye song. By the time she was done, there wasn't a dry eye in the bunch. She was tired of being sad.
Her footsteps stilled because she was done lying to herself. It wasn't her pain she was feeling. It was him. He was also feeling guilty. "Dez, where_____."
Instead of finishing that question, she decided to find out for herself.
He was standing with Hayden.
She really needed to learn how to control her gift. Instead of showing up in the background so she could sneak away, she showed up right at his side.
Hayden's gaze dropped immediately. "My Queen."
Fuck a duck.
She left as quickly as she could, regardless of how much of a sucker and a wimp that made her.
To say she was about to lose her crap was an understatement.
All those times she'd known it had to be a girl, but she didn't want to be right. A part of her wouldn't believe it or accept it until she saw it with her own eyes. Pain tore into her chest.
Ray of fucking sunshine.
Jess tensed, feeling him at her back. "Don't. Just go away."
He disappeared, and Julian took his place.
"Babe, what___."
He sent Julian to her. That action was just as bad as a confession.
"I'm okay."
He took her into his arms, anyway. "I thought you were having a good day."
"Can we get out of here? I need away from this place just for tonight."
He always knew what she needed. He smirked. "I know where to get my hands on a motorcycle."
"No shit? Can I drive?"
"Like I'd ask my babe to ride bitch."
"I'll find us some sleeping bags."
They rode until they ran out of gas, then they started a fire and sat snuggling under the stars.
Jess waited until Julian was sleeping before she slipped away to visit her mother. She found herself here more and more lately. Usually with no clue what to say or what to do.
"I wish you were here." She whispered.
There was so much she wanted to say to her mom. So much she wanted to ask her. If her mom was here, then she could make it through this.
"Your husband didn't make it either, mom. I don't know if that would have given you peace or not, but I thought you should know. I have a friend who sees spirits. She told me you aren't here. I'm glad. It would be painful to think that you couldn't find rest because of me. Mel is good. She's doing better than me."
Instead of looking at the rocks that marked where her mother laid, Jess looked up at the stars. "There's a whole world out there. A whole world of wonders and I still ended up with a broken heart, just like you did. They have the cure for the virus. They can cure almost anything except for how lost I feel."
She laid down next to the rocks. "At least tell me you're finally over him. Tell me there's an end to it."
There were more stars in the sky than she'd ever seen before.
"You would like it, mama. There's already so many changes. I think the world is already healing. Before I was hurting too much to notice but now, I do. I wish you could be here to see it. I wonder what you would think to learn that I'm a Queen now."
Jess smiled, just a little. "Probably the same thing Julian says. I'm a born ruler. I'm okay. You rest, mama. I'll do what you would do if you were in my place. I'll get to work."
