My Life Is A Bigger Mess Now

Part Two - My Best Friend's Big Day

In our third year at uni, when we were 21, Patrick decided to get engaged. A year and a half later and there we all were. In some old church, that was ridiculously fancy-looking, waiting for his bride to come down the aisle. I was stood by his side when the doors opened and revealed her in her stunning white dress. I swear I could hear Patrick's heart skip a beat when she started coming towards him with the organ playing that traditional wedding song. Across from me and Patrick was his wife-to-be's bridesmaids. One of them was a friend of hers from her childhood who she was still close to; another one was Olivia, who looked great; and then there was my Anna. She looked fantastic in her bridesmaid dress. I'd argue that she looked better than the bride herself, but I'm slightly biased. I'd also never say that to Patrick or his wife's face.

It was in that moment, when I was looking across the aisle at Anna that I realised she was who I wanted to spend my life with. We weren't in the spot that the bride and groom stand but it felt like we were and it just felt right. She felt like the person I was meant to marry and grow old with. I could see it then – I could see the wedding and our lives together – and I see it even more now.

The ceremony was amazing. Their vows were really honest and heartfelt, and I'm surprised Patrick didn't need my help writing them. Seriously though, they were beautiful. I was happy for him anyway, because he's my best friend, but after hearing how much love they had for each other and how they felt, it was a different happiness I had. It was more confident. I knew my best friend was in good hands now. Which was a little bittersweet. Just like when he moved away for uni, it felt like the end of an era. We weren't single 18-year-olds anymore, we were in our mid-twenties and we were starting our family lives. It's a bit of a scary idea, to be honest, but scary in an exciting way. I can't wait for this chapter of my life. I'm ready this time. Or at least, that's how I feel now. I know that it'll probably all crumble when I get in his place. I'm still just a 20-something-year-old with a girlfriend.

After the ceremony came the celebrations. It started as any wedding reception does. Toasts and speeches from those closest to the bride and groom. This was my time to shine.

First up was Niamh's childhood, and best, friend. She gave a lovely speech about them growing up and how proud she was of her to find a nice man like Patrick to settle down with. It was a great speech.

Next up was Eddy. He didn't have much prepared but he was always better off the cuff. Nothing showed that more than his speech then and there. It was really good stuff. He was uncharacteristically open and emotional, and ended it by wishing the newlyweds a happy life.

After Olivia's speech, it was my turn. Hers was actually quite similar to mine but I wasn't too worried. I stood up, downed my champagne, which got a laugh, and smiled. "God, I'm gonna need another one – and so is everyone else – for these stories." I started. There were a few laughs and, surprisingly, a few other men in there who downed their drinks in solidarity with me. "No, I'm just kidding. I won't say anything too embarrassing. I don't want to scare Niamh off, although she's kinda stuck with you now. That whole 'til death do us part' is a huge commitment. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you both that today has been lovely. The ceremony was amazing. Niamh, you look stunning, Patrick... you look okay, I guess." There were more laughs, "Honestly, guys, you did a great job. Those vows. Beautiful. Although, I am pretty sure Patrick has told me all that stuff before. How he loves me. How he will stay with me until we're grey and old. How he'll make love to me... Ah, wasn't meant to say that out loud." More laughs. Perfect. "When we first met, Patrick was the only person who talked to me. It meant the whole world to a socially anxious 11-year-old me. I can't thank him enough. He's been my best friend for the past decade or so and I can't wait for him to be yours too now, Niamh." The room was quiet but in a good way. That's how I wanted it. This wasn't a joke, there weren't meant to be laughs. This was me being honest with them, "You two are clearly made for each other. I'm happy for the both of you, but I'm really just happy to finally have some help in taking care of this man-child. Niamh, he's yours now." I raised my empty glass and gave a nod, as people laughed at my final joke, before sitting back down. I think I did a pretty good job. I got laughs when I wanted them but I still got across the message that I'm happy for them and their marriage.

The rest of the reception was good fun. There was lots of drinking, some dancing, and thankfully someone brought an Xbox so there were some video games being played too. It was a great night and only got better as the sun went down and the moon came up.

Anna and I were drunk as skunks when we danced our way back to our room. I don't remember too much about what happened in the room due to being blackout drunk but I remember it being a great night, if you get me. The following morning wasn't as great – definitely not as great – but I'll always look back at Patrick's wedding with a smile and a certain happiness. It was a really good time.