My Sexual Abuse Story

Big Changes

Ok so, ever since I told my parents it's been like uh... 6 months. Nothing much has been done since I freeze up whenever I try to talk about it. But that's not what I wanna talk abt in this chapter.

A big change that I just came to terms with myself. I just realized like an hour that I'm asexual. I think this is because of my childhood trauma that the whole thing of sexual attraction and all that was ruined for me in a way. I don't feel attracted to anyone at all, I've had a crush before, but I wasn't attracted to their body. I thought it was weird that I had a crush on someone that I didn't even know. No it wasn't a celebrity. I had a crush on my online best friend. I forgot what I called him in this... lemme check.

Ah yes, Alex. The name sounds like a play boy name, but yk let's move on. I didn't even know what he looked like for like a whole 5 months of our friendship, but I still developed feelings for him. When I finally got a face reveal it didn't change how I felt towards him, I still liked him. He's kinda cute, but I wasn't attracted to him. This is where I sort of got the idea that maybe I wasn't straight.

Anyway, im not as close friends with Alex anymore, I don't have a crush on him anymore. Oh also. Alex was asexual. He said he's not asexual anymore which i don't think he's too convinced on. He's an aromantic asexual but doesn't want to be. He wants to be like everyone else and be able to have feelings towards people. I think he's gonna settle to just asexual tho.

Welp, that was it. I don't think I'm going to tell any of my friends about this. I'll let them figure it out on their own.

6/21/21