𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 ◇ ChanLix

Ch. 47

Chan POV

I don't know what it was, maybe he he lied to my face about a huge issue, but I really didn't want to see Felix.

I felt betrayed whenever I looked at him. His photos on Instagram, his contact, my camera role, anything to do with him.

I just couldn't wrap my head around how something like this happened. He was supposed to love me not hurt me.

I'd he had just told me, maybe Dae wouldn't be in a therapy session as we speak, maybe he wouldn't have this fucked up thought that I was going to pack up and leave him at any given time.

No, he wasn't the one who hurt Dae, but the way he handled the situation definitely attributed to it.

I always put so much trust in him. I thought that it was impossible for him to do that type of thing.

I guess when a relationship is that God damn perfect, at least something has to be a big fat lie.

I loved Felix, and yes, I still did, but oh hell was I angry about all this.

He should know how much a child means to their parents- or in my case parent. He has a kid of his own!

And not just any kid, a kid with a severe mental disorder, someone he also has to try his best to keep happy.

Min had and sometimes is in the state that Daehyun was in for 4 months, I assume, that by this point he would understand how this works.

I hadn't confronted Daehyun about anything to do with this new issue yet because I had a feeling it wouldn't help with getting better.

He'd probably think that it was his fault for telling Felix that one thing had nothing to do with the other.

I didn't blame this on Dae though, I very much believed that this was kind if Felix's fault.

He was a grown man and somehow still managed to keep this from me for so long- three months!

What did he think could possibly come from this? That I would be happy I'd been lied to about my ex being back?

I groaned in frustration.

"You should really try and see it from his point of view Chan." Jisung sipped his drink.

"How can I possibly give him benefit of the doubt? This is my child we're talking about!" I put my hand over my eyes and leaned back on the counter.

"He was convinced that it was having no negative affect, sure, he should have still told you, but Dae didn't want him to." Jeongin added.

"Thats a good point. He was under pressure from Daehyun not to tell you. How could you go behind such a cute child's back?" Changbin pouted.

"I really don't think this is Daehyuns fault." I said slightly annoyed at what they were insinuating.

"Oh, no, no, no. That's not what we are saying, I'm saying you need to try to see what Felix sees." Jeongin clarified.

"Yeah. Right." I said looking at my feet. I still felt like he should have done better...

"Look Channie," Changbin started, "Take this relationship advise from me-"

"Oh please," I rolled my eyes, "You and Hyunjin are only fucking. What advise could you possibly give?"

"He has a point." Jisung smirked, "All you guys are is fuck buddies. There's no relationship in that."

"Shut up! I'm trying!" He crossed his arms and sent a glare our way.

"Right, so take it from me," Jisung said, "The way you've been ignoring home is really not helping. Communication is key."

I had been ignoring him. Sometime he would call or text trying to sort this out, and every time, out of the pure pettiness of my heart, I either left him on read or declined his call.

"I know that much." I mumbled, "I've just been mad."

"And you have a right to be. But just try to understand that you need to talk this through eventually. Putting it off is doing no good." Jeongin shook his head.

"Y'know, I find it funny that when I get mad at Felix and he tells his friends, they all hate me, but when he messes up and I tell my friends, they take his side." I pointed out.

It was true. When I got overly mad and yelled at him, I swear Hyunjin tried to kill me on multiple occasions- not to mention Seungmin.

He was giving me a death glare everything he saw me for 2 months after that.

"I'm not taking his side." Changbin rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, he really did mess up, but you aren't acting the right way either. You should talk to him if you want to fix this." Jisung entered.

"What if I don't want to fix this?" I cocked my head to the side.

"Then you'll lose the sex you love so much. You dont want to lose that do you?" Changbin asked.

"Ulike your relationship with Hyunjin, ours is not completely about sex. Sure it's a plus, but that's not what it's about." I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

Did he really think that that was the only thing I cared about? Railing Felix. Really? His faith in me is so low.

"It's true." Jeongin nodded.

"Look, just text him. Ask him to talk and tell him how this made you feel. He can say what he needs to and boom, you guys are back to fucking every other night." Changbin smiled.

"Wow. Genius plan buddy." Jisung rolled his eyes, "He us right about the talking part though."

I shifted my wait from one foot to the other as I looked around at the kitchen.

"I guess I should call him back then.." I paused, "What if he already gave up and wants to break it off?"

"I doubt he could do that. You guys had a lot going for you. Just pick up the God damn fuckinh phone and text him." Jeongin scolded me.

He was the youngest, but he was still pretty damn scary.

I picked up my phone walked out of the kitchen and speed dialed his number.

"Hello?" His voice rang across the line.

1046 words

I have no comment for this chapter 😐