Can I love you?

Rain

It was the next day and I wake up to get ready for school. I was not in the mood for this, but i had no other choice. I go to my wardrobe and take my favorite t-shirt out with a matching jeans. I grab my bag to get to school as I has my shoes on. "Bye mom", "bye y/n have fun" she yell from the kitchen as I closed the door behind me, on my way to school.

The first lesson was math. I sit there, my head resting on the palm from my hand, looking out if the window. Lost in my mind, didn't give them all attention, until a girl who sit next to me and tip my shoulder to signal me that I should listen better. I thank her and looked back to my teacher who explain us that we think that we have a lot of weeks for our final exams, but we should start learning for it, that we have a better change to understand all better. 

The lesson get over slowly. The feeling that 10 minutes passed and the look on the clock over the door say different things. Thinking that 10 minutes passed was in reality 1 minute and I know that it will take long to get her out. 

------(time skip last lesson)---

The bell ring and I said bye to Emma who have a other lesson then me. Now we have English and that would mean I see Billie. I slowly made my way toward the room, not really wanting to see she now. I just want to go over she and push all the feelings away I get when I think about she. We all sit  on our places waiting for Miss Howard to come into the room. She was the only one who was not here. Strangely enough, everything was quiet. I don't know if it was because my mind was again not here. my chin rested on the palm of my hand and my eyes looking out of the window next to me. Watching the dark clouds on the sky and the little raindrops who roll down of the window. As I looked over to the clock I see that Billie is already 20 minutes to late, what she don't do usually. It was weird that she is late, and some from my class said that she now go and ask where is our teacher today. 

After a few minutes the two comes back and tell us that we can go now, because Miss Howard was not here today. My eyes widen as I heard it. She not here, why she shouldn't?. Was I the reason that she don't come here today?. As I was outside of the building I take my phone out to write her, but I stopped. Almost forgot that I end that what that was, and I still don't know what it was. I take my phone back, with my headphones in my ear and a message sending to Emma that she know that I was earlier out of school and on my way home. It's raining as I walked back home, with my headphones in my ears and music  on full power, trying to get so my mind a bit more clear. The rain getting more and I keep walking down the street toward my house. My clothes was drenched from the rain and I can feel my wet clothes stick on my skin. Problematic that my jacket have no hood, now my hair was drenched too and water run down my face. I was happy that my phone was save in my pocket. Fuck why it have to rain now?, I was angry about it. Angry about Billie and about me. But more about me, what I did. But there was no chance to change it now. It was to late. And she also choose her side as I asked to help her, to get out but she say she have to think about it and so on. Bullshit, she was afraid to be alone, but I was there for she, and something me said that I would never leave she alone. But I can't say it her. I don't know what she think about me and what she feel, and I don't want to make it uncomfortable for  the both of us. I was almost home, happy about the thought to take my wet clothes out, take a warm shower and put other clothes on who are not drenched from the rain. 

After a warm shower and sitting on my bed with dry clothes I get a message from Emma if she can come over, because school was over. I wrote her that it rain a lot and she should go home and we would see us then tomorrow, but she wrote she have a umbrella and that she can go the way because I didn't live far away from school. I wrote okay and lay my phone to the side, with my back on the bed and closing my eyes, wonder why Billie was  not in school today, maybe she had a appointment or so, I should stop think about she now because I know Emma comes over in a few minutes. Suddenly as I thought it to the end the bell ring and I run the stairs down, to see she standing there, smiling at me as she saw me. "Why you didn't go home, your crazy" I say and let she in, closing the door behind us. "It look nice" she say ass she turned around. "Thanks, but you didn't saw all",  "maybe you can show  me?" she smiled and I smiled back. 

"Miss Howard was not in school today, but a other teacher did her  lesson", "yeah we had she in the last  to but she was not there. Do you know why?", "just a appointment or so" I nodded my head and lead she up in my room. "Why are you here?", "maybe we can watch a movie together if you want, I wanted to see you that's is" she say. "But II can go if you want" she continue and looked at me. "No I'm happy that you are here, I'm sorry I didn't mean it so", "in almost two months are the final exams you know and I would ask you now, before someone other ask you this, if you want then to go with me. I know we still have time but yes".  I was thinking about why I shouldn't go with her, there was no one other who would ask me or I can go. "Yes", "yes?. You don't have to say now", "I know but why I shouldn't? right?", "right" she answer and we both smiled. "Come now let us watch a movie" I say and take her hand and lead she the stairs up in my room and watch a movie.

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A/N: I'm sorry this is not good but I don't  have any ideas for it. I hope the next chapter are better.