YOU [tom holland]

05- Second thoughts

January 13th - The morning after the incident

Tom arrived home at four in the morning.

He never intended to be awake at this time, It was never usual for him to be up so late in such a busy week, especially if he had shit to do in the morning; he has been working non-stop all day long, being awake so late at night was never on his plans, but shit happens though, and he had to deal with it like he always did.

Some of the few examples of these tragic events that supported his theory:

1) He never wanted to be played like a tennis ball by two big companies, and just about a couple of months ago, he was.

2) He didn't want to be reshooting his last movie, that he was supposed to launch about two years ago, but there he was, going back at it again and again.

3) He didn't want to be writing his own scripts over a due date, but he was being pressured to do it.

And now... now was the best part. He didn't want to be picking up calls in the middle of the night, but then he had to find out his girlfriend was completely wasted and had to get up and go make sure she wasn't in a weird situation, or even worst... dying or something. That's the last thing he wanted, to have her being alone in a sketchy situation.

So yeah, shit happened and it happened to him more than he usually asked for. Things couldn't always turn out like expected, though, that was for sure.

After leaving her home, it was hard to drive off from her street and go back to his own home. He found himself speechless, completely frozen, not able to speak properly, and with an awful feeling in his chest that more than painful, felt heavy. It was like something was weighing on him and he didn't know how to fix it. Like she had taken something from him that broke him completely in a quick second. He wanted to take that out, but he didn't know how.

It was the effect she had on him. This woman caused him to feel too many things at the same time. After four years, it still felt overwhelming.

There he stood, right after she walked off, sitting inside of his car and watching her stumble back home. He doubted if he even had to get up and go help her, he knew that even that would be asking for trouble after everything she said, but he just couldn't get himself to do it, he could not, he was left completely speechless with her words; he just waited until she got in safe, did not make one single move to help her out. She wanted to be alone, then she would be. Right now he had other things to worry about, and he should get to the bottom of it.

How did she even find out about Olive? He was careful with every single one of his moves, there was no way she had found out about this by herself, it was technically impossible. However he had come to this, there was something failing around him, things were not in control as he would have liked and that wasn't right.

Someone had snitched, that must be it, he thought, someone's snitching and now she knows.

Fuck me.

Too many questions, so little answers. At this pace, he might as well need to do a check on who to trust, because clearly if he even tried to do anything else, someone else might let her know of his doings and she might hate him forever.

He didn't want that, he didn't want her to hate him. He loves her, so much. The thought of her hating him made him sick... he couldn't even believe this was happening, it was not supposed to happen in the first place.

Just as he felt his head filling in with questions, that's when he knew it was time for him to go back home. The last thing he needed right now was being to anxious to drive safely, and it would be nice to avoid an accident thanks to his overthinking brain; if he had one he would not only be in trouble himself, he would also be in trouble with his producers and everyone else who depended on him, his family...her. He could see that picture clearly, and it was not a nice one, so he decided it was enough. He would shot his brain down for a while.