Blind Channel Oneshots

I want what I can't have Part 8 (Alex Mattson)

Person: Alex Mattson 

Warnings: Angst...

Image: After you call Aleksi you go home...

I try to focus on this Aleksi Story (It's no oneshot anymore ahahah).

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It was a really dark night and I was just trying to get to my apartment quickly. So much went through my head on the way to my apartment. Actually, it was only fair that after I hurt Niko so much that he hurt me. I deserve it.

 But I still didn't think that Niko would fuck someone else so quickly, it's all my fault, I just don't know what I'm feeling. I love Niko and it will always be like that, but I also have these new feelings for Aleksi. I cannot classify this new feeling. 

Aleksi was always just a good friend, I never noticed how incredibly sweet and respectful he is and those damn blue eyes.

It was only a few meters from my apartment. I still hoped this was all a bad dream but slowly I gave up hope. "Y / N" a familiar voice suddenly said to me. I turned around in shock. Aleksi stood by my front door and smiled at me. 

His eyes were circled blue and his nose was pretty much any color, it looked really painful. "Aleksi" I said softly. He looked at me in shock because he noticed that I had cried. "What happened Y / N" he said as he got closer to me. "Joel, Joonas and I were looking for Niko .." I paused briefly and looked at Aleksi. 

"He was in that one bar wherever we are, he just made out with another woman". I noticed how a tear rolled down my cheek but Aleksi was there immediately and held my face. "Y / N I'm so sorry I ruined your life". 

I looked deep into Aleksi eyes and more tears flowed down my face. He still held my face in his hands. "Aleksi you didn't destroy my life, it's my own fault" I said while looking at his red and blue face. before he could answer I said "this looks painful".

 I pointed to his face. "It is," he said while smiling. I had to smile too and then hugged him. "Can you sleep here today, I don't want to be alone" I said while I broke away from Aleksi.

"Sure," he said and nodded. Aleksi and I went to my apartment together and I immediately lay down in my bed because I was so tired and exhausted. 

"I sleep okay on the couch" said Aleksi while he watched me as I collapsed on the bed. I looked at him confused. "No, never you have already get punches for me today just so that Niko is not so mad at me you are not sleeping on the uncomfortable couch" I said while I pulled the covers up further. Aleksi smiled uncertainly at me but then lay down next to me.

I lay silent next to Aleksi and we looked straight at the other one. "Thank you Aleksi" I said. "For what. Nothing is good what I did today Y/N". I looked confused at him. "You said Niko that you are the bad one and that I don't want to kiss you. 

And that this is all your fault. And this all because now he is more angry at you and not me". Aleksi looked back at me and said nothing for a few seconds. "Y/N I love you I always will take care about you. Every time I saw you I think oh my god this woman is amazing. I would to anything for you".

At that moment I just wanted to kiss Aleksi but I knew that I couldn't hurt him too. I just smiled at him and a little later we fell asleep.

The next morning I woke up on Aleksis chest. "Morning Y / N" he said when he realized that I was awake. I moved away from him quickly. "Sorry you could have woken me up if that bothered you". He smiled at me "You mean that you slept on my chest".

 I nodded to him and looked at him. His left eye was quite blue and swollen, and his nose was worse. "It didn't bother me that you slept on my chest" said Aleksi as he got up. I did the same and headed for the living room. "Do you think Niko is coming to the studio today, yesterday was really busy" said Aleksi while he took his things.

 "I don't know. I don't even know if I want to see him," I said in response while looking sadly at the floor. Whenever I think of Niko, I think about how he hit Aleksi yesterday and how he kissed the girl. "Let's go" I asked Aleksi to distract from the topic. 

He nodded and we both went downstairs and got in the car to go to the studio. I looked at my cell phone and hoped someone cancels the rehearsal for today, but nobody did. When we got to the studio we got out and went to the front door.

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