Once in a Lifetime

Nineteen.

Louis was crying in his room, clinging to a photo of him and Zayn surrounded by balloons and banners and stuffing their faces with birthday cake, when the doorbell rang. His family had gone to see Zayn's parents, something that Louis wasn't ready to do, so he stayed at home to hide under his duvet. The doorbell rang again, causing Louis to groan and drag his feet down the stairs and towards the front door. He didn't want to speak to anyone, but the shrill sound of the bell was driving him insane. He flung the door open, revealing a person he wasn't expecting to see.

"Happy birthday, Lou," Harry whispered, a sad smile following his words. Louis couldn't believe Harry was standing there, but it only took a second for him to step forward and allow the taller boy to wrap his arms around him. He cried into his shoulder, Harry's curly hair smelling like apples and cinnamon. The hug lasted for a few minutes until Harry broke away, letting Louis lead him into the house and close the door behind them.

"How, how did you know?" Louis asked, sitting next to Harry on the sofa as he continued to wipe the tears from his cheeks.

"Liam, um, he rang and told me he was worried about you. He asked me to phone you and, um check in, but I didn't want you to be sad on your birthday. Why didn't you tell me?"

"It's my 21st, Haz, Zayn and I had been talking about this day for so long. Like, we were going to throw a party and invite all my friends and we were going to get drunk and go to the club and celebrate our final year of uni before we become proper adults. The thought of doing any of that without him just didn't seem worth it, so I pretended it wasn't happening. Obviously, Niall and Liam knew, but I couldn't bring myself to tell you. It doesn't feel right celebrating my life when Zayn's ended, you know? The boys wanted to party before we left for the holidays, but I said I didn't want to make a fuss. I don't know, I'm sorry, I should have told you, but I didn't want to make a big deal out of it, it's just another trip around the sun, after all." Louis cried softly as Harry engulfed him, rubbing his back and trying to make him feel safe. It was all Harry wanted - he thought Louis deserved to feel happy and protected, and he wanted to be the one to give him that.

Within an hour, they were in Louis' room, Harry laughing at all the teenage posters that still adorned the walls. Harry kept pointing out the medals and the trophies, and Louis kept telling him to stop being annoying. Harry couldn't help but notice all the pictures of Zayn around the room, and he wondered whether they had always been there, or if it was something Louis had done since he got home. When the front door opened, and a woman's voice filled the house, Louis grabbed Harry's hand and pulled him down the stairs.

"Mum!" Louis called, his voice mixing with the laughter of the children Harry guessed were his sisters. Louis held Harry's hand until they reached the kitchen, where he was met with three people who were the female equivalent of Louis.

"Louis, you didn't tell us you had a friend coming over," Louis' mum said, shaking her head at Louis as he began to blush.

"Yeah, sorry, it was a bit of a surprise to be honest. Anyway, this is Harry, Harry this is my mum, Jay, and my sisters, Daisy and Phoebe," he introduced, pointing to each person.

"Uh, hi," Harry started, "um, I'm sorry to intrude on your Christmas." Jay quickly shut him down, telling him that any friend of Louis' was always welcome, no matter what day it was. They chatted for a bit, and Harry struggled to tell the difference between Louis' sisters. Louis laughed every time Harry said the wrong name to the wrong twin, and eventually he stopped trying to figure it out.

"So, what would you like to do for your birthday dinner, Louis?" Jay asked, causing Louis' smile to disappear.

"Actually, um, if it's okay with you, and if Louis wants to, I was thinking maybe I could take Louis out for the evening?" As soon as those words left Harry's mouth, Louis grinned, pleading with his mum to say it was okay. Of course, she agreed, and it didn't take long for the boys to be sitting in Harry's car as they drove around town. "I've never been to Doncaster before and it's, uh, Christmas Eve, so I'm just going to drive until we find somewhere worth eating, okay?" Louis nodded, laughing as Harry tried to concentrate on all the road signs through the dark. Within twenty minutes, Harry pulled into a carpark opposite a KFC.

"Trust Donny to have a 24-hour KFC, eh?" Louis laughed, walking beside Harry as they entered the restaurant. They ordered their meals and sat down at a booth, laughing and smiling at each other. Harry enjoyed the way Louis' eyes crinkled when he was happy, and how his blue eyes shone when Louis looked across the table at him. For Louis, it was the happiest he had been in a while. He was happy sitting in a fast-food joint at 7.30pm on Christmas Eve, listening to Harry's terrible jokes and eating as much chicken as he could. He forgot to worry about Zayn not being there, he forgot to worry about all the plans that he had made that could no longer happen, he forgot to worry that he had killed his friend. Harry's company was the best thing that ever happened to Louis, and he found himself getting lost in his emerald eyes as he listened intently to Harry talk about his family back home. Harry said that his family didn't mind him leaving, and his mum had even asked him to wish Louis a happy birthday. It felt normal to be with each other, a feeling that Louis wasn't used to. When they had finished eating, Harry drove them back to Louis' house, before insisting that they went out for a drink. As nervous as Louis was, he agreed anyway, and took Harry to the pub that he had frequented with Zayn whenever they were home. They drank the night away, laughing, smiling, dancing and being silly, until they eventually stumbled into Louis' room in the early hours of the morning.

"I can't, uh, I can't drive home," Harry mumbled, struggling to get his shirt off over his head.

"Then you'll have to stay with me," Louis answered, pulling his clothes off until he was just in his boxers.

"Are you sure your, um, your mum wouldn't mind?" Louis shook his head, motioning for Harry to join him under the covers. He got in, their shoulders touching as they lay on their backs.

"Harry, thank you for coming. You made my birthday pretty cool," Louis smiled, turning to face his friend.

"I couldn't stand the thought of you being, um, sad. I don't like it when you're sad," Harry pouted, causing Louis to poke him in his side until he started to giggle. "Lou, stop!" he laughed, reaching out to do the same to Louis. It didn't take long for them to be in a full-blown tickle fight, leading to Louis climbing on top of Harry to get the better angle.

"You know, from up here, you look pretty," Louis mumbled, stroking away some of Harry's curls that had fallen in his face.

"You look pretty from down here, too," Harry replied, his fingers gently grazing Louis' hips. They stayed there for a minute, gazing into each other's eyes. "Louis?" Harry whispered, the hairs on Louis' neck standing on edge at the deepness of Harry's voice.

"Hmm?"

"Merry Christmas, darling." Louis smiled, rolling off Harry to put his head on his chest.

"Merry Christmas, Hazza." As the boys started tofall asleep, both their minds were racing at the fact they both enjoyed theposition they had just found themselves in.