A Co-Captain's Doubts

Backup Plan

Hey! An early update because I had the writing bug and I'm excited to get to the next chapters I have planed *rubs hands together* lmao. Thanks for your continued interest in Co-Captain's Doubts, I hope you still enjoy it as much as I do! See you in the next chapter!

Beep. Beep. Beep.

Laying with one arm draped over his eyes, Sugawara sniffed and clenched his jaw until his teeth creaked. The lights were off in his hospital room and the only illumination came from the annoying machines he was connected to, the steady beeping of his heartbeat agitating him.

Tears rolled hot and unyielding from the corners of his eyes, slipping over his temples and running into his silver hair. He was so frustrated with himself; he wasn't even completely sure why he was crying. Was it because he wanted to go home and couldn't? Maybe it was the pounding in his head or the stinging ache in his hand. It could be the fact his parents were displeased with him or was it the irritability that came with a concussion?

"We won the match."

Suga flinched as Daichi's words replayed in his head, a fresh stream of tears flowing as he squeezed them shut. Maybe he was crying because he was irrelevant. Replaceable, forgettable...

Beep. Beep. Beep.

Left to his thoughts, Suga spent his night trying to fall asleep and failing. The doctor had mentioned both inability to fall asleep and excessive sleeping as possible side effects, it seemed he was experiencing the first. Even after his tears dried into salty tracks on his temples and his breathing settled, he couldn't get Daichi's voice out of his mind.

"We'll be okay without you." And they had been.

Without Suga to cheer them on or give them further instruction, Karasuno won the match and proved they didn't need him. Kanda was right, and he hated it. He was a loser.

His thoughts spiraled like this for hours, his brain bouncing around and shifting restlessly until the sun began to rise. As pale morning light leaked in through the sheer curtains hanging over the large window, he groaned and blinked heavy-lidded eyes. He didn't feel well, but he was sure it was due to his night of no actual sleep.

"Oh, isn't it a little early for you to be awake?"

Slow to respond, Suga's movements were lethargic as he blinked and rolled his head to look at a young light-haired nurse entering with a clipboard clutched in one arm. She looked as though she were sleepy, but her soft smile and mellow tone was a pleasant contrast to his somber mood.

Clearing his hoarse throat, he raised his good hand to rub his eye. "I've had some trouble sleeping... Do you know the time?"

Her response was light as she approached the side of his bed and wrote down a few things after observing the machine there. When she was finished, her attention went back to him. "It's 5 am. How are you feeling?

5 am, that meant he had another 5 hours of laying here before he would burden someone with transporting him home. To an empty house, because his parents would be working, and his brother would be out with friends. The thought of the echoing silence made his chest ache.

"Mr. Sugawara?"

"Uh- sorry. What did you say?"

"I asked how you're feeling?" She repeated, still kind and reaching a hand out to lay against his clammy forehead. He flinched at first but relaxed when the touch was gentle.

"Oh... Uh... Not particularly good."

"I see. You feel warm, I think you might be running a fever."