Behind The Sea- DEAD POETS SOCIETY STORY

Chapter Four

Desmond woke up the next morning and had a book for breakfast. She shot up out of bed, wide awake. Her feet scattered and moved themselves across the freezing cold floor. They then slid into some thigh high socks and were covered by leather bound shoes. She debated for five consecutive minutes of if she should wear tights, stockings, or high socks. She opted for high socks. It was very cold that morning and socks were thicker, therefore making her legs warmer.

She sat at her desk and got out her makeup mirror. She put her makeup bag in the desk and reached in, pulling out all different things for her eyes, eyebrows, and lips. She brushed clear gel through her brows, and dark thick black mascara through her long luminous lashes. As she did so on her right eye, a gentle knock sounded at her door. She stood and smoothed her skirt, opening the door. There stood Todd, looking a bit ghoulish and still groggy. She invited him in and he sat at the end of her bed, right by her desk.

"Nervous?" She asked. He cleared his throat and nodded.
"I think every time I breath I'm going to be sick." He chuckled. She laughed a bit too then grabbed her schedule from the binder that was by the door. She gave it to Todd.
"Check my schedule, see if we have any classes together." Todd began scouring his eyes across the paper. She watched him out of her peripheral vision.
"Every class we have together except our science course. You have AP physics. I have biology." He said with a smile he finally didn't even attempt to conceal. She laughed and took back her schedule and then went back to her makeup. She felt his eyes on her as she did so. She didn't mind. Todd envied the way her fingers traced her cheekbones, the way her fingers gripped the mascara wand, the way her lips smacked together after a fresh coat of lip gloss. He always say with his mother and watched her do stuff like this. Then at a certain age, his father became disgusted and upset at the fact that he was so intrigued by women, and not in a way his father had hoped.

The Anderson family was very heavily into the church. Their deacons and ministers said Todd showed obvious traits and signs of homosexuality. That's what got Todd sent off to boarding school. So he couldn't see girls and the way they dressed, spoke, and did feminine things. But around a year ago, the town ministers changed their conversion course plans and decided maybe it would be good for Todd to see a real woman... that's why Todd started attending Welton. There were only 9 girls at this school. That was the perfect amount for the Anderson family. Jeffrey Anderson, the oldest son, was happy to go to college and miss seeing Todd's misery. He always pitied his little brother. He knew his little brother didn't CHOOSE to create problems for himself, the family, or an uproar within the church. So he didn't see the point in trying to change Todd. Todd wasn't broken and in need of fixing, he wasn't lost and in need to be found. Todd knew who and what he was and found comfort within those depths. Jeffrey was proud of him for finding himself. Who cared who or what Todd was going to spend his alone time with and who he was going to marry in fifteen years... man or a woman, Todd's significant other wouldn't change who Todd was.

"Want to try?" Desmond asked him. Todd was pulled from his sea of memories and looked at his best friend. She held a mascara bottle to him.
"I-I don't think I should." He said. Desmond rolled her eyes and a smirk tugged at the corners of her lips.
"It's not a matter of if you should... it's if you want to." Desmond grabbed a clear mascara and showed it to Todd, instead of the black one. He smiled and nodded. She cheered a bit and stood up, brushing the brush through his eyes. He grabbed her hand and clenched it because he was nervous. His body was stiff and his face was shaking. He had never held something so close to his eye before, let alone makeup.
"If I liked girls the way you liked boys, I'd probably fall in love with you." Todd said. He said that because no one had made him feel this liberated before. Desmond gave him this sense of, he could do whatever he want whenever he wanted at whatever location and time. It was different from the feeling Neil gave him. Neil gave him this feeling of warmth and pride. Desmond gave Todd the ability to be himself, while Neil made Todd feel prideful to be himself.
"That's very sweet of you, Todd. How come you don't like girls?" She asked him as she began bringing the gel through his eyebrows.
"I don't know. It's more like... a platonic relationship with girls. I want to be friends with all of them but none of them have ever made me..."
"Made you feel as if you would die without them? Like the way Neil Perry makes you feel." Desmond said as Todd opened his eyes. She stood back and put her makeup away. Todd just blushed at her words. He didn't need to reply to let Desmond know she was exactly right. Desmond picked up her mirror and placed it in Todd's shaking hands. He looked at himself intently. Although it wasn't much, it meant everything to him. His lashes were longer, his eyebrows were full, he had a smile that no one could tear from his face.
"You're a beautiful boy, Todd." Desmond concluded. Todd just cleared his throat. He didn't know how to respond to compliments. He simply couldn't. It wasn't one of his strong points.
"Can you show me how to do this later?" He asked as he stared at himself longer. Desmond collected all of her things to get ready to leave.
"Absolutely." She said with pure joy in every syllable. Todd nodded his head in a rapid pace then followed her out of her dorm.