All I Ask of You

Chapter 16

I stood up and faced him, "Oh Erik..." I gazed into his eyes. I had no idea what to expect. As much as I was familiar with this new world, I had to remind myself every so often that this was real life. The Erik Destler standing in front of me was a real man with real emotions, real pain, and a real story. I stood on my tip toes and put my arm around his neck so he could hold me close. I brought my head to his left ear. I whispered, "Only if you're ready."

He took a step back from me and coughed into his handkerchief. Then he stared at me for a moment. I could see the pain of his past rushing back to him as he squeezed his eyes shut. I wanted to tell him so many things, but I didn't want to overwhelm him in this already emotionally straining moment. 

"Erik," I said quietly, "Please look at me," his eyes wouldn't meet mine, "Erik, please." 

He coughed and leaned against the wall for support. Eventually, he slid down the wall and sat on the floor with his back against the wall. 

I sat down next to him on the floor, "Are you alright?"

He nodded, "Come here," he whispered bringing me into his arms.

I had to tell him how I felt. We had spent at least two months living together by now. First, I had almost been dead and now Erik was fighting for his life. I couldn't bring myself to say the words I wanted to say, and I waited for Erik to speak. 

His voice was thick, and I could tell he was holding back tears without looking at his face. "It was there when I was born, and those awful doctor thought they could fix it with some sort of acid. The acid only made it worse. The deformity itself was purely in the shape of my face and skin. The acid caused the skin to burn and be an awful red color for the rest of my life. My mother sold me to a freak show which wasn't so bad when I was younger. A young gypsy looked after me like I was her child. Then she died suddenly, and then I was at the mercy of the owners. Without her, I had no voice. Eventually, I escaped with the help of a dear friend of mine, Madame Giry. She was a young ballerina at the time. She brought me to the lair to live. I owe her my life."

I turned my body so I could see his face. I gently placed my hand on his left cheek against his smooth skin. He held his eyes shut, but tears still managed to escape, "I've never willingly showed anyone my face... Not even Christine."

"You don't have to," I whispered, "I would never ask you to do something that would hurt you." 

He brought his hand to his face as tears continually slipped out of his eyes, "Promise you won't leave me..."  he let out a small sob. 

"Never," I said as I sobbed too, "I will never leave you."

Slowly, ever so slowly he removed his mask, displaying his whole face for the first time. He refused to open his eyes and his grip on my waist loosened as if he was preparing to let me go. 

"You can open your eyes, darling. I'm not going anywhere," I gave him a gentle kiss on his deformed cheek. His deformity was a combination of both the movie and the stage musical. The shape of his face was certainly deformed on that side with a patch of almost dented in bone. The skin was gnarled and marred as well. Additionally, it was all red from the acid burns from so many years ago. 

He sobbed and made himself go into a coughing fit, "Please don't cry, darling." I moved myself so I was practically sitting in his lap. Then I put my arms around his neck and stroked his hair. Suddenly, he held me tightly and buried his head in my neck. "You are still the most handsome man I've ever met." 

He was unable to speak, and so we held onto each other as if letting go meant we would lose one another forever. Finally, I spoke, "Erik, you must eat. Come," I offered my hand to help him off of the floor. 

I led him to the dining room, and he sat in a chair. His mask was in his hand, and he turned it over in his hands. I placed dinner on the table and took my seat next to Erik. Erik looked at me as I began to dish out our supper, "Please be honest," he spoke for the first time in several minutes, "It doesn't bother you?" he motioned to his face. 

"Not at all. You needn't wear that awful thing around me. That is, of course, only if you're comfortable without it," I motioned toward his mask. 

"Let's eat. Shall we?" he smiled at me for the first time with his whole face.

"A lovely idea. I'm famished," I smiled back at him.