The King is Dead

Trap

The days are passing much too quickly. Shouto's brain can't keep up, so it doesn't even try. He finds himself slipping and coming back to talkative dinners, hushed voices trying to coax him out of this state, his lunch on the ground, his dinner in the toilet with the body's bile it's his body? Right?

He doesn't eat lunch at school. He doesn't try to get a tray anymore. The people who hate him to an obsessive level are still opting to kick him when he turns a corner, he lets them. If he fights back, he'll be expelled. He can't disappoint Hizashi.

He always 'wakes up' when he's training with the class. There's one time he's paired with Shouji, the guy with arms that have ears and eyes on them. Todoroki carries the exercise for them, using his ice to freeze the invisible girl and Ojiro. Ojiro doesn't like Todoroki, he's scared but he doesn't stare anymore. Todoroki thinks he favors Ojiro out of the rest of the class.

They design their hero suits- Todoroki lets Hizashi help him after being told he doesn't have to look like his father. He drifts for the rest of the conversation, the speaking muddled and image fuzzy.

In one training session, he's sparring quirklessly against a girl named Jirou. He does something father would beat him for. When he has Jirou's arm in his hands, her body flying over his shoulder as he's about to win, he sticks his foot out. It probably still hurt her, but he had caught her lower back with it, making sure she didn't hit the ground so flatly. When she stares at him for an elongated time, he thinks it's too much and he lets the windshield cover with rain.

This feels a lot like a missing month. No feeling at all. His body takes notes during class, he studies them when he's in his room. He trains with his classmates, trying his best not to scare them off like he did with mother. He doesn't know if it's working.

Days are passing quickly and after some villains attacked a place he doesn't remember being, he's sitting in Hizashi's living room, watching for hand movements the way he always does.

"I wanted to talk to you about this first. How have you been lately?"

Gone, he wants to say. He wants to tell the truth and say he hasn't been anything lately. But he settles for, "Fine." Hizashi's dejected look brings him something akin to sadness and he lifts his hands again. "Better."

Hizashi smiles and his hands don't come up again. "I did some research, about the mute stuff. From now on I'm gonna gradually stop signing with you, okay?"

Todoroki shakes his head. That's not okay. He doesn't want to talk and he doesn't want Hizashi to stop signing to him. He likes watching Hizashi's hands move and he likes reading the shapes they make.

"And you should start talking too. You haven't talked the entire month."

A month. It's been a month. He hasn't talked— it's been a month that he's been slipping. It's too much.

"Let's start now, okay? I'll say something and you say something back. It's gonna get better like this."

Todoroki is shaking his head and Hizashi must've spoken with Aizawa. Usually, he'd submit to it, he'd say that it's okay, that he'll keep signing. But now he's acting strangely and Todoroki doesn't like changes.

"Todoroki, everything is okay."

It isn't. Everything is awful and Todoroki wants his dad back and it's too much.

"We're gonna get through this, okay. Breathe for me. Do you want some ice cream?"

Ice cream. He knows ice cream. He likes it. Hizashi eats ice cream with him after dinner. It's safe, Shouto nods.