𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄

XIII - Denial

♥︎•♥︎

[As we near the end, I wanted to include more of Sakusa's POV]

Pointless.
And empty.

As simple as that sounded, those were the only words that could describe how I felt as I took in her warm embrace.
"(y/n), you really are such an idiot."

Her hands curled into tight balls at the back of my trench coat, my dark eyes as hollow as ever. Had anything changed? Even a bit? Mint chocolate-chip ice cream dripped down from fingers. I did feel something at the moment:

Pity.
As much as I despised feeling or receiving pity, that's all I could feel. So much pity for such a pitiful person. If someone could read my mind at that very moment, they might say i'm rather self-absorbed and cold, looking down on people even at their worst. I wasn't trying to make her seem helpless and weak, l knew she wasn't. She had carried Hanahaki with her in secret much longer than most people could've. She chose to carry the burden herself, if that wasn't strong, I didn't know what was.
Yet here I am...
Feeling my eyes tremble as they focused on the poor soul in front of me. So fragile and soft all of a sudden, as if they weren't even the same person. Was this really the same (y/n)?

"Do you feel anything at all Kiyoomi?"
she croaked in that hoarse voice of hers.

I stared down at her, feeling her clutch against my coat get loose. "Feel?"

"Sadness, happiness, empathy, anything other than annoyance and anger?"
she sounded desperate.

I almost chuckled. "I am human y'know."
"Oh really? I never see you acting like it."
I clicked my tongue slowly.
"We haven't known each other long." I said.
"I knew you in my first year, we were in a group together for gym." she whispered.
I didn't recall, though to be fair, I didn't recall much at all from my first year.
"Should've said hi."
she pulled away, smiling between tears:
"I didn't think to bother you then."
"So you bother me now?" I asked.
Wiping her tears swiftly, she nodded.
"Someone has to make up for lost time."