More Check Ups

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"Date of Birth?"

I've seen it before, but for some reason, I'm still looking at the melanoma poster. It's been a little over six months since my last doctor's appointment, which means I'm due for another checkup. And I'm heading off to college in a week, which is perfect timing. I guess life just fits together like a puzzle sometimes. I finally move my eyes away from the poster with the ugly moles and look at the receptionist. It's the same receptionist as last time, I remember. He probably doesn't remember me, which is good. I don't want to exist in people's memories. That's weird. I tell him my birthday, stuttering as always, but he just nods his head and tells me a nurse will tell me when the doctor's ready for me. He hands me the same form as last time, and I go over to my seat.

I can't believe the last time I was here was more than six months ago. That's crazy. Time flies when you're having fun, I guess. I've changed so much in such a short amount of time. I'm still a walking blob of anxiety, but at least this blob is a little more excited for the future, and a little more confident in him. And this blob has a blobfriend (see what I did there?) who loves him, and an acceptance into one of the U.S.A's top colleges. This blob is going up in the world. Nothing can stop me now.

I fill out the form, the same as I did last time. Until I get to question 14. I write yes.

This time, I'm truly all alone in this doctor's office. No handsome stranger walks in. Speaking of handsome strangers, today, believe it or not, is the six-month anniversary of me and the stranger since I first saw him in this hospital. Crazy, right? Six months. Six whole months. Six months and counting.

If you asked Darrion of the past what he would be doing in six months, he definitely would not say that he was going on some surprise anniversary date with his boyfriend. But that's what I'm doing. As soon as I'm done panicking in this doctor's office, I'm off to Roger's, where Santi is going to meet me. I have no idea what we're doing, but I'm excited. Scratch that I'm very excited. Really, I'm very excited for whenever I get to be with Santi. Having this be in celebration of knowing him for half a year is the cherry on top.

I finish the form in the nick of time, before the nurse comes and calls me into the room. Same room as last night, basically the same appointment. The doctor asks the same questions, I respond with the same answers. I'm just hoping he doesn't bring up the change of answers on question 14. I'd die. Truly. Luckily, after everything is done, the doctor wishes me well, and sends me on my merry way.

I walk out of the doctor's office, more like a fast walk actually. I can't wait to see, Santi. I truly can't. Unlocking my bike from the bike rack takes way too long in my opinion, even though it's only a few seconds. I open up the bag I have with me, to check to make sure Santi's gift is still safe and secure in there. And it is, so I sigh in relief. I hop on my bike, strap on my helmet, and start to ride.

Summer is slowly coming to a close, which is always a bittersweet occasion. Especially when the summer is the best summer of your life. Yet, I always love this time of year because the trees are still green, and the flowers are still full and bright, but the sunsets are the best out of the whole year. They take up the whole sky practically. Maybe I'm only saying this because after Santi took me to that beautiful sunset point, I've been paying special attention to all the sunsets. They remind me of him. They help me miss him less, after I said goodbye for the night less than an hour ago. What? Don't get mad at me for loving him.

It's still fairly hot out, despite the night starting. I have a jacket shoved into my bag, just in case, but Santi would give me his in a heartbeat if I was ever too cold. Just another thing I love about him. The streets are fairly busy for this time of day, but I enjoy watching all the different cars pass by as I bike. Jazmine used to make fun of me when I told her I like watching cars, but I just find it relaxing. Speaking of Jazmine, we've still been in contact a lot, which is fantastic. I was scared we would drift apart, but that's definitely not going to happen. Despite being there for only a few weeks at this point, she's already made friends with the whole school basically. She says that she loves her soccer teammates, and her roommate is basically a carbon copy of her, which I couldn't imagine. Two Jaz's? Impossible. Overall, I'm really happy for her. And she seems to be happy too.

Santiago and I agreed that it would be best not to be roommates, because 1) we would never leave the room and 2) even I think it's too soon for that. But the option is still on the table for sophomore year. The possibility excites me, even though it's over a year away. So what? I'm a romantic. A car that looks like Santi's except in a different color passes me, and it causes me to smile. Anything to do with Santi makes me smile. It actually starts making me pedal faster. I don't want to be away from him for any longer than I need to.

I signed up for my classes at Dartmouth already. Most of them are general education classes, because they are required and I'm indecisive, which means I still have no idea what I want to major in. I was thinking math, but what can I do with a math degree? Business, maybe, but I really have no idea what that is. Architecture sounds fun, but then again, I can't draw for shit. Some sort of scientist? That's probably my most confident no, other than teacher. Having to deal with teenagers every day is definitely not what I'm going for.

I turn my final corner, which means it is a straight path down to Roger's. Down to Santi. Speaking of Roger's, I wonder how Rebecca and Vivienne are doing. Are they still together? Did they have a nasty break up? I wonder if there's any way I could reach out to Rebecca. I wonder if she even remembers me. I actually hope she does. At this point, she's probably a full ass adult with a job and everything. I'm gonna be a full ass adult soon. But I'm not rushing. I'm just enjoying life right now. Enjoying it with Santiago by my side. As I bike down the final street, it really starts to become nighttime. The weak streetlights flicker on, as I continue to pedal. I've always liked biking during the night. It makes me feel special. Like I'm the main character, even though I'm definitely not. Only a few more blocks till Santi.

Santi told me he's trying to become a lawyer, mostly because his dad was a lawyer. He wants to follow his dad's footsteps. And I think that's pretty cool. I have no idea what that means curriculum wise, but I'm excited to see where it takes him. Honestly, I have no doubt that Santi could succeed at whatever he wanted to. Because he's Santi. And I can't wait to be there to see it.

I can finally see the final intersection before I get to Roger's. And that's when I see Santi waiting on the street corner, waiting for me. I wonder how long he's been standing there, waiting there for me. I smile and I hope he can see it. He waves to me as I continue to bike over to him. I'm almost there. Even from a small distance away, his smile glows through the night air and strikes me right in the face. I can't wait to kiss it off his face. I finally reach the intersection and continue pedaling. Every foot is one foot closer to Santi.

You know, there's this funny math concept I learned in math right before school ended. It's called Zeno's Paradox, created by this Greek dude, I think, named Zeno. Basically, the paradox talks about getting between two points in a straight line. Point A to Point Z. Me to Santi. In order to get from A to Z, you first have to get to the midway point between the two. Let's call that Point B. Okay, so now you are at Point B. A little bit closer to Santi. But now, you have to go from Point B to Point Z. Okay, not hard, right? Wrong. You have to go halfway again, let's call the next point, Point C. So now you are at Point C, which is closer to Santi, and you only have a quarter of the distance left. You should be able to get there lickety-split, right? Not yet. You have to go to the midpoint first, Point D, which leaves you with an eighth of the distance left. And this keeps going and going and going, leaving you with a smaller and smaller portion until you reach your Point Z. Until you reach your Santiago. And because of this, you are obviously never able to reach your destination, because there is always that fraction of the distance left. But the thing is, you actually are able to get to your destination, cause that's how the world works. Bit there are no flaws in Zeno's Paradox! Funny, right?

Well, the actual funny thing about Zeno's Paradox is that it assumes you're able to reach that midpoint first. Able to reach point B. Able to get halfway to Santiago.

In this real-life example of moving from Point A to Point B, I don't. I don't even get halfway.

Santi's face suddenly vanishes, as my entire world is taken over by a bright, bright light. Way too bright a light. I'm barely able to turn my head, and see the headlights of a semi-truck, coming at me faster and faster, going farther and farther, before it hits me.

And then, it's white.

Not from headlights. Or streetlights. Or sunsets.

Just white.

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