Deep End (ShikamaruXOC)

6.

We'd been traveling all day, back through the land of earth and the hidden rain and to the edge of the land of fire. We had decided to travel after sundown for a bit and go longer than usual now that the enemy had been captured. We were just on the outer edge of the land of fire when Shikamaru stopped.

"I think we should rest for a while; it's got to be the middle of the night by now."

I sighed in agreement, "Yeah that's a good idea."

We agreed to set up camp below and started a small fire, all of us grabbing some food pellets and laying out our sleeping mats.

"I'll take first watch," I announced, "I'm really not even that tired."

The two men protested but, in the end, I won and sent both of them to go try and rest while I watched. I leaned up against a tree and stared into the fire, thinking about my jutsu, the first time I used it.

"Go on now Choi, don't worry we're ready for whatever happens."

The third Hokage looked to me thoughtfully and nodded, standing with my sensei, Kurenai. They both had their ears covered and went to shut their eyes, leaving me to use my newfound power on the criminal tied to the chair in the center of the room. He looked frightened, he'd committed a lot of petty crimes against the village, but he was certainly no serious threat. I'd be worried too if I were him.

"Hello," my voice rang out into the empty space and the man's eyes fixed on me immediately, "Listen to me now."

He nodded vigorously, jaw slightly agape, "Okay."

"Don't talk. Not unless I tell you to," the man once again nodded staying silent, at this point Lord Third and Kurenai had opened their eyes again, "Tell me, what do you see right now when I'm speaking to you?"

"I see a beautiful aura, I'm not quite sure what it is. Everything else is blurred and dull in comparison."

I nodded and looked to my sensei for reassurance, she smiled, "How do you feel about this aura you're seeing?"

The man strained against his restraints, "It's like everything I've ever wanted or dreamed of is finally right in front of me! It's like I finally found the one true thing I desire and I'll do anything to have it, it's right at my fingertips!"

His chair rattled on the floor below it as he struggled to get closer to me, "Stop moving or you won't be getting anything. What do you see now?"

I made direct eye contact with the man, my amber eyes glowing and his own fluttering and clouding over, "I see a beautiful woman, she has a child on her hip and is waving at me. She's calling me home. It's a beautiful home."

So, this man just wanted to build a loving home? That's all he ever really wanted, and now he'll never have that chance...

My head pounded and I found myself falling to my knees on the ground, the jutsu breaking, and the man coming out of his daze. Kurenai sensei rushed forward, releasing her ears and coming to my aide, Lord Third watching the scene intently. The man groaned in agony and let out a strangled sob, tears beginning to flow down his face.

In his sorrow he managed to get to his feet, still tied to the chair, sending Kurenai into a ready position to defend me, "Where is it!? I was so close! Everything I ever wanted was right there! Where is she!?"

"Sir you need to-"

"You! You made me think I was about to have the world and now it's gone forever!"

The man gave me one more pained look before letting his head hang, we thought his sorrow had found its end, but it had only just gotten worse. Within seconds the man made himself tumble downwards and snapped his neck on impact. I let out a shriek and Kurenai sensei shielded me from the sight as Lord Third let in the guards from outside and told them to take the man's body away.

I looked up at my sensei with watery eyes, "I didn't mean to make him do that! I never told him to do that! I'm sorry, sensei!"

She petted my hair and shushed me, "Choi it's alright, it is not your fault that this man took his life. His grief was overwhelming and that is a battle one loses with themselves. Just promise me something, okay? Never use this jutsu on a fellow leaf ninja, no matter what."

Lord Third set his hand on Kurenai's shoulder and looked down at me, "It seems that the withdrawal of their desire can be so great that one can commit insane acts of sorrow like this man just did. This jutsu is never to see the battlefield unless it is absolutely necessary. Do you understand Choi?"

I nodded, drying my tears and standing once again, I vowed to never use that jutsu on anyone I had a shred of a care for and I never did.

I was startled out of my little daydream by Shikamaru coming to join me, "Why don't you get some rest? You exerted a lot of chakra today unlike me and Genma."

Shaking my head, I made some room for him to take a seat next to me and felt my chest flutter when his arm came to touch mine at our close proximity, "No that's alright, it really doesn't drain me much physically or mentally. It's an emotional thing."

His chocolate-colored eyes bored into the side of my face, "I see. Well then I guess we'll both just keep watch over Genma."

He settled in even more and I could feel his thigh side by side with mine, giving me that familiar aching between my legs. Ugh! Why did I have to react like this to Shikamaru of all people!?

"Choi?"

"Shika?"

I turned my head to meet his gaze, finding our faces much closer than I anticipated and letting a blush rise to my cheeks, "Remember how you had that little crush on Genma growing up?"

My jaw dropped slightly and I peeked a quick glance at the sleeping Genma before returning my gaze to Shikamaru, "Shh! Yes I remember, and he never knew about it okay?"

His eyes never left mine, "Do you still feel that way?"

I felt my nose scrunch up at his words, "Ugh why would you even ask that and why do you care?"

"Just wanted to know while it's just the two of us talking here."

"...Well, no, I don't feel that way anymore. I mean, I still kind of get nervous and get butterflies around him, but not like I do with..."

Not like I do with you.

I cleared my throat and met Shikamaru's gaze again, "Anyways...no I don't really feel that way. What about your little thing with Temari? Haven't seen her around much anymore."

He leaned his head back against the tree, revealing a side profile of him I'd never really seen this close. He looked like he was shaped with every perfect angle a man could want, "Oh that? Yeah, that just didn't really work out. I think I was just trying to...I don't know. She's a great ninja and a good ally, but she's not the person I really want in the end."

I felt an ache in my chest at the thought of who it is he might want in the end and how that person wasn't me. Do I have feelings for Shikamaru!? I could sum up the night in the bath on how lackluster my love life has been, but this feeling? Fuck.

With that thought I quickly got to my feet, feeling the cold night air to hit the parts of me no longer touching Shikamaru and turned to look at him, "I guess I should at least try to rest before we continue home."

He nodded solemnly at me and I went to lie down, though I found myself not sleeping at all. I just lied there awake, my mind racing at the thought of suddenly having feelings towards the shadow ninja who I'd always fought with.