Before I Forget.

n i n e

[taylor]

    A few of the guys were huddled around Sid who was sitting on the couch. They all snapped their attention to me as I came down the stairs with Joey close behind. "What the hell is going on?" Shawn questioned not attempting to figure out what Sid was mumbling. I felt a pant of guilt when I looked behind me at Joey, who was flushed with embarrassment. Why the fuck did I kiss him?! Yeah good job Corey, go in there to talk about his mental health and end up almost sleeping with him. "We um..." I tried to answer but struggled to find the right words. "It was nothing really." Sid finally spoke up. "I just uhh..."
    "It's fine Sid. It's none of their business anyway." Joey said with anger obvious in his voice, sliding by me and out the door, but not before he grabbed a beer from the fridge. He slammed the door shut and sat down on the second step of the stone stairs that were outside our house. "What's with him?" Mick said looking around at the other confused faces. I ignored him and followed Joey. I watched as he pulled out a box of cigarettes from his coat pocket and lit one up. He offered it to me and I took it from his small hands. I took a drag and gave it back to him. Joey let the cigarette hang from his mouth as he open his beer and took a swig. He looked down to his feet, "You uh- b- back there...d- did you um- mean it?" Joey practically whispered.
    I froze. Shit. What do I say? Spur of the moment, didn't know what I was thinking? Or the truth. The ugly truth that I had feelings that weren't mutual, feelings I couldn't shake no matter what I did. Who the hell could love you? I'll tell you, no one. Your disgusting, heartless, beaten up and bruised. Too fucked up to love or be loved. "No." I finally answered plainly. My eyes stayed planted firmly on the ground, not wanting to see Joeys reaction. "Yeah, I didn't know what I was thinking." He said with an awkward chuckle and I felt my stomach drop. Told you he didn't love you. The voice in my head spat at me.
    Joey stood up abruptly, beer in hand and cigarette hanging from his lips. "Just forget it ever happened, yeah?" He took one more drag and then threw the cigarette on the ground. I didn't answer, only watched Joey slip back into the house and retreat into his room.

[jordison]

    I ran up to my room and slammed the door, leaning against it for support. "Fuck!" I picked up the first thing I saw and threw it at the wall. I watched as it shattered and fell to the ground. It was a framed picture of Corey and I, I choked out a small laugh. How fitting. I slid down to the floor and pulled my knees to my chest. I'm fine. I'm fine. I wasn't. I needed a distraction, something to take my mind off Corey. I stood up, changed into some black and red tripp pants, a fishnet shirt, and put an oversized slayer shirt over it. I did my regular makeup, grabbed my keys and headed out.
    "Where you off too?" Paul asked, he was making a sandwich with his back to me. How the fuck? "I know everything Joe." Paul said basically reading my mind. "Out." I answered simply. Honestly I didn't know where I was going, just anywhere but here. I walked to the door, passing the entrance to the living room on my way. I felt the stares of the guys bore into me. "Yes?" I said snapping my head to Mick, Sid, Jim, and Corey who were all sitting on the couch. "N- nothing." Corey whispered and looked away. "Joe, seriously where are you going." Paul said stepping closer. "Jesus! I'm a grown ass man. I'm pretty sure I don't need to check in with you guys if I wanna go somewhere!" I spat and Paul backed off, shock plastered on his face. I spun back around and slipped out the door.

[taylor]

    Shawn came into the living room with anger evident on his face, "The fuck did you do to him?!" He shouted at me but I didn't look at him. Shawn pulled me up by my shirt and shoved me against the wall. "Don't fucking ignore me, Taylor." He warned, "Someone tell me what the hell is going on!" Shawn looked at Sid. "Sid? What happened?" Sid sat still, his eyes rapidly going back from Shawn to me. "I kissed him." I muttered and Shawn loosened his grip on my shirt. He, along with the other guys (other than Sid obviously) stood shocked. "I don't know what I was expecting but it wasn't that." Jim broke the silence and I felt a sharp pain spread across the side of my face. I fell to the ground. "YOU WHAT?!" Mick, of course it was Mick. He was always the most protective of Joey. "I- k- kissed him. It was a mistake, I just got caught up. I didn't know what I was doing." Mick reeled his fist back, getting ready to punch me again but Craig stopped him.
"Cool it, Mick." He said firmly and Mick stopped it his tracks, putting his hand against his side. Craig kneeled down to me and placed a hand on my shoulder. "Can we have a minute...alone." Craig shooed the guys out and Mick huffed but listened to Craig. After we were alone he spoke just loud enough for me to hear. "You have feelings for him or..." I paused for a moment before nodding. "I told him I didn't mean it though. I- I don't want him to think I'm...I don't know." I shook my head and scoffed, "I mean who could love me."
"Joey." Craig stated simply. I shot my head up. "What?" Craig just smiled, "Joey." He repeated. "God he's had feelings for you for as long as I can remember, when we were in high school he would never shut up about you. He was like a lovesick puppy." He had feelings? "Oh god...what did I do." I got up, grabbed my keys. I gotta find him. I have to tell him the truth.

do u like this chapter?? idk how to feel about it