TWO FACED

Lower

It started after you constantly told me I have gained weight

So i thought I would prove you wrong so I did I didn't eat "junk food "

I cut out my favorite foods I started running I started working out.

It soon became an addiction a bad addiction

Why you may ask ?

I became addicted to the scale going lower and lower

It started by me weighing myself once a month

Then twice a month

Then 1 once a week

Then 2 twice a week

Then 7 times a week

Then 3 times a day

This addiction had me losing myself

I no longer wanted to lose weight I wanted to disappear

I wanted to disappear completely

This addiction had me damaged

Damaged beyond repair why?

I lost what made me a woman

I lost it and slowly this addiction was visible

Constantly counting calories

To be skinny eat these many they said

I halved those

Slowly I halved myself

And the day the addiction of going lower stopped

When I fainted on a run with friends and the guy I liked in Germany

This addiction had me miss out on memories I could never get back

So now I stand saying I no longer want to go lower I want to be stronger

-Dania Punjani