Stay Till The A.M [Alex T]

I'm not yours

 wake up every morning, the years ticking by

I'm missing all these memories, maybe they were never mine

I feel the walls are closing, I'm running out of time

I think I missed the gun at the starting line

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At least I haven't had to see him.

Because I haven't left the house.

Which sounds bad but life just sort of smacked me in the face.

After he told me the reality of how things were and how clueless I had been all my life my depressive state had gotten worse. I had barely left bed to go do the normal everyday things. Basically I go get up to shower in the mornings and that's it.

But, after a long and tiresome few days of doing absolutely nothing, I got up, and I went to work. I actually woke up and thought, "I have to go to work". After days of sick pay I had decided it was time to face people and become a human again. One thing about work is I'm there for the people. Everyone is always so kind and I love my co-workers along with the customers that decide not to be rude. You get the odd person that comes in and it's like "you came in here to buy and you are being mean to the seller?!"

As I enter my place of work I see Natasha, the cashier mostly. Every so often she ventures away, to help people or re-stack shelves but you will most likely find her at the till. She waves enthusiastically from the back of the store.

"Damnnnnn girl haven't seen you in a hot minute where you been?" she comes round the desk to hug me. She wraps me in a big bear hug while waddling me back and forth.

"Been... preoccupied with stuff. Anyways, how you been? Everything alright with you and Don? The shop alright?" I question. Last thing I heard was that her boyfriend Don was being difficult and acting like he doesn't want her around and being out the house a lot. I don't pry to much, but with not seeing her for a week I'm curious.

She takes a deep sigh and begins "I don't have a clue what he want from me girl, I give him all I can and he not satisfied. Sometime I think he creepin'. He come home late and don't tell me where he been and it pissin me off big time. I love him but I can only take so much and if he don't give me nothing I can't keep doing it you know. It's draining putting in work when you have nothing to work with." she admits. I feel so sorry for her. She's the one with actual relationship problems with someone who is present in her life right now. While I'm stuck on someone from my past. She's so strong. "Anyways the shops been good you know sales after we got those flares in have been so sigh. Thanks for that by the way we would be lost without your investment in 'on trend' clothes"

I have a taste for what looks cool. It doesn't necessarily have to be 'on trend' as Nat put it as long as I gain some looks of admiration from random people walking down the strip.

"Well I'm glad business was booming for you while I was gone" I say with a small laugh, and watch as Nats smile slowly vanishes. I'm confused as to why until she starts to speak.

"Are you okay though? Seriously, I haven't seen you in a week and you walk in here with what I can tell is a forced smile" she says with a frown which automatically makes me frown. I know she's just trying to help but I came to work to forget about him.

So I put on a smile.

"I'm fine, seriously. I had a run in with an old friend that wasn't really warranted but I'm moving on."

"Good, your getting on, everything will be fine, just get them out of your mind and everythin will be fine" as she finishes a customer walks in, and my sole focus is on helping them find something to buy.

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so... heyyyyyyyy.

I'm not dead but I may have well been. I am so so so sorry for not updating in 2 FUCKING MONTHS WTFFFF. This is a really REALLY short chapter. Like less than 1,000 words but this is gonna be a double update. I'm hoping to get the next one out today at some point!!! hope u enjoy and stick around, remember to VOTE!! - Thanks Evie xx