you first {minsung} DISCONTINUED

sixty-three.

Jisung lied when he told Felix he was ready for school. He was currently lying in bed, still in his pajamas and with major bedhead. 

As soon as he set down his phone from texting his bestie, he threw himself out of bed, sprinting to the bathroom where he splashed water on his face and brushed his teeth in record speed. 

Normally, he could get ready for school in just a few minutes because he didn't really care too much about his appearance. 

But today, today was different. 

If he really WAS going to confess to Minho, he wanted to look at least a little bit presentable. The problem was, he had ten minutes at best before Felix showed up. So he had to hurry.

Jisung speed-walked into his closet, where he glanced around at all the cute clothes he owned that he never wore. He settled on a pair of baggy cargo pants with chains attached to the belt and a horrendously oversized graphic tee, with his favorite black platform combat boots. He hurried over to his mirror, putting on some small silver hoop earrings and brushing through his hair with his fingers so it was fluffy and hanging over his forehead. 

He glanced over at the corner of the counter, where a makeup bag was lying. He really really wanted to do a smoky-eye look he had pretty much perfected from whenever he did makeup in his room in the middle of the night, but to his mom makeup on guys screamed gay even though idols and celebrities wore it all the time. 

Deciding to just fuck it and do what he wanted, Jisung impulsively grabbed his makeup and leaned closer to the mirror so he could see better. He made sure to not use his cut hand too much as he did his makeup, but he really didn't care that much. 

Once he was done, he looked in the mirror, then hesitated, knowing the one thing he really wanted to use to complete his edgy look for the day. He headed back into his closet, grabbing his rainbow beanie that he had secretly bought when he was out "studying" with Jeongin one time. He placed it on his head, letting his hair hang out of it to graze over the front of his face. 

Looking in the mirror, Jisung knew he wasn't confident enough to go out like this. He knew he would probably change into jeans and a hoodie, take off the makeup, and maybe burn the beanie. He could reverse what he had just done in a matter of minutes and no one would even know. 

But then his phone started ringing. 

The second he saw Felix's contact light up the screen, he knew he was screwed. He hadn't actually intended to go to school like this, but now it was too late. 

His heart was beating like crazy in his chest. He whipped his head around to look back in the mirror at himself. 

He had to be honest, he felt like he looked good. He felt confident and pretty, but he knew that the second he stepped out of his bedroom, that confidence would turn into self consciousness. 

But he was an idiot and he was out of time. 

At least the beanie was easy to take off. Jisung wasn't ready to out himself like that - even though confessing to Minho and possibly becoming Minho's boyfriend (AHHHH) would out him just as much. 

Jisung pulled the rainbow beanie off of his head, tossing it onto his bed before grabbing his phone and backpack and heading towards his bedroom door. 

He looked back into his room, ran back to throw a blanket over the beanie so his mom wouldn't see it if she came in, and then exited again and shut the door behind him. 

"Jisung, I made breakfast!" he immediately heard his mom yell from downstairs. 

"Okay!" Jisung yelled back, but then realized that even though he had taken his beanie off he still had all his makeup on. "I mean, I'm not hungry!" he hurried to correct himself, making a beeline for the front door. 

He sucked in a sharp breath when he felt his mom's clammy hand latch onto his forearm. 

"Jisung, you need to eat something before school." Her voice didn't sound mad. It sounded almost caring, since she didn't seem to be drunk or in a bad mood, but Jisung knew that all that would change as soon as he turned around. 

"Please, Jisung? I made maple oatmeal. You always loved oatmeal when you were a kid. . . ." 

Jisung squeezed his eyes shut. "I-I'm not hungry, I'm really sorry-" 

Jisung's mom grabbed her son softly with her other hand, turning him so that he was facing her. 

Jisung didn't open his eyes as he felt his mom turn him around. 

Silence. 

Jisung swore he could hear his heart beating. His mom was being deathly silent, but he refused to open his eyes out of pure fear. 

He knew she would yell any minute. She would push him, swear at him, scream at him. 

But as much as he was expecting his mom to be angry with him, he wasn't expecting the pain. 

A sharp feeling slammed through his body, starting at his cheek where he knew she had hit him. 

It was like it happened in slow motion. He could feel the impact as if it was happening over and over again - her hand, full of fury and adrenaline, smashing against his face, each individual finger leaving a trail of stinging pain, one area in particular practically screaming in pain as something sharp tore through his skin. 

His body crumpled to the ground on instinct as he desperately tried to blink away tears. The entire side of his face was on fire, and he immediately knew the wedding ring that she still wore had cut into his cheek. 

"Get out of my fucking house," his mom muttered from over him. 

He finally managed to open his teary eyes, looking up at his mom as he cowered on the floor. 

She had already turned away. 

a/n ❤️