I woke up and looked at the time... 1:47 P.M.
Great, just great.
As I dizzily arose from my bed, memories of last night's endeavour came flooding all throughout my head. Enzo, Astoria, Theo, all of it.
How could I be so dumb? How could I let myself get to that point? How am I going to fix things?
Once I had fully gotten up my body was immediately tackled back onto the bed with a sudden sensation of lightheadedness.
"Fuck" I groaned.
Pansy wasn't here, I was all alone battling these emotions, figuring out the best way to handle the consequences of my prior actions.
I don't deserve my friends, I don't deserve Hogwarts, I don't deserve any of it. My parents were right to treat me like shit! All I ever do is mess everything up! Break everything nice! Ruin everything meaningful! I shouldn't even be here! I should be dead! No one deserves to have to live with someone like myself in their life! Death should be my punishment!
It was decided.
I walked over to my bathroom with a small pocketknife from my dresser in hand. I look in the mirror, honestly terrified of what I'm about to do, but then stop and smile. I smiled. I realized that when I go through with this, all of my problems will be over. I won't need to deal with any of it. It's the easiest solution for myself.
But wait, that doesn't sound like a punishment.
I debated killing myself there and then, or letting myself live.
If dying is a blessing, then I should live. But I don't deserve to live!
I came to a conclusion, I shall live a tortured life... and with that I cut slit after slit down my arms. Drops of blood and tears dripping down my body, mixing into a watery concoction. I wasn't afraid to cry, I wasn't afraid of showing weakness, I was alone. No one was her to see it.
I let myself cry, I let everything out, and in the end I was met with my body drenched in blood, sweat, and tears.
I picked myself up, looked in the mirror, and recited my very overused motto:
"Head Up.
Stay Strong.
Fake A Smile.
Move On."
And that I did, I smiled, practicing the face I'd show others later on. Others whom I did not drunkenly scream at the previous night.
As I walked into the shower, I set the water hotter than usual. All heat was on me. It was almost as if I was trying to burn my skin of and start my day with a new one. After all, snakes shed their skin right?
I felt the water pound on my red, sensitive skin.
I decided that I shouldn't be wallowing in my sorrow, after how I've caused it for others. I was to take a shower, and fix things as best I can....
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Okay! I get that there is only like 5 words on this page, but it's just a filler! I have HUGE plans for our next few chapters!
Also, I have a challenge! If we can get to 100 votes on this story, I will update 3 chapters ( not just fillers ) in one day!
Let's see if we can do it! It's not too far away!
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Please, Not Again... | Mattheo Riddle
Romance*Definitely a slow-burn* Y/N Y/L/N meets with Mattheo Riddle once again. He'd left, and let's just say you didn't miss him. He's back, but how will things turn out considering you're stuck between him, his own brother Tom, of course Mr. Blaise Zabin...
