when she loved me / clifford

officially coming out to you guys

hi guys. as many of you may already know, i am bisexual. now, bisexual means that i find both male and females sexually (lol) and romantically attractive just to put that out there although i am sure you guys knew that. as you can tell, this isn't a chapter. no, this is me officially coming out to you guys that read this.

i had been struggling with my sexuality for almost a year(??) in private, trying to tell myself that this was all just some fucking phase or something like that. after getting loads of encouragement from an internet friend named tamara, i started to take into consideration that i may have an attraction to both men and women. this wasn't something i took easily. i spent nights trying to figure myself out, how i would tell people, etc.

that went on for months. months guys. i spent about four months figuring this out. the day i finally came to my senses was when my mom asked me what i was writing in my journal. i had written about two full pages on the way gay people are treated, how we are all human, how we have no right to judge, etc and i began explaining this to my mom. she sat and listened as i ranted about this topic. then, i started to cry and tell her how horrible it was knowing parents will actually turn their child away, and be so horrible to a person they are meant to love.

my mom asked me,"jaden, are you trying to come out?" and i got shaky and said no, because in all honesty, i wasn't. but i knew i needed to. i knew that by this time i was bisexual, and i would have to tell her. the next moment truly showed me how much of an amazing woman my mother is. "jaden, if you were, you know i would never treat you different, right? i would still love you just as much. you are always going to be my daughter, and nothing can change that. i don't care if you like girls, or guys, or both. i want you to be happy jaden."

i love my mother.

so, knowing i had my mom, i did what i planned. i came out to her. she said she was so proud of me.

i have not came out to any other family members because most of them are highly religious and do not support this. i have however, came out to my friends (one of whom is my ex boyfriend who is like my brother wHO supports me no matter what oh wow i love my friends) and after it was all over, i felt so relieved. i felt as if i was free of a big weight on my shoulders. i felt like i did when i told my mom and few close friends about my depression and cutting. (im okay guys i promise) i felt like that pressure was off and i could be myself.

this is long so i am gonna try to bring it to a close.

here are a five things i have gathered about myself being bisexual :-) :

• i am not confused

• just because i may have a boyfriend/girlfriend does not mean i am no longer bisexual

• i do not 'fancy' everyone i see

• my sexuality is not something you can use against me or try to bring me down for

• just because i also like girls, does not mean i hate men. i actually really fucking love men, i mean, have you seen norman reedus????

so guys, i know this is long, but i felt the need to put this in here just so you guys know that yes i like girls and boys, and that yes it is okay. straight people are perfect. bisexual people are perfect. gay people are perfect. everyone is perfect. no need to judge or add harsh labels or slang words :-)

if any of you have some coming out stories of your own, please tell me them. or if you know someone who has came out, tell me how you reacted.

and, if you yourself are confused about this topic, thats okay. im not telling you to come out for the first time in the comment section, but feel free to do that or you can just vent about your confusion or anything. please don't feel shy.

thank you for reading this.

i love you all.

love,

a human who believes in equality.