Wicked Games

Apologies and Assignments

AN: Hello!! I am so sorry this has taken me so long. Life has been crazy! I will apologize in advance, I did not have the chance to edit this so please forgive any mistakes you may find. No chapter warnings for this one! (Brief sad Bucky as a disclaimer I suppose) Enjoy! - Amara

BUCKY POV

Watching her walk away from me was always hard, but this time it was different. She was leaving because she was afraid. She was afraid of me. I never meant to scare her, but the bourbon was clouding my judgement like smoke. The smoke could only be attributed to the fire in me created by Tony Stark. He always insisted on making me feel like I was never going to be good enough for Y/N.

I tried calling, texting, nothing. I know she's upset, but I just need her to hear me out. I would never hurt her on purpose, she has to know that. Seeing her walk away into the comfort of M'Baku stung. I know they are very close, and he is protective over her, but she is my responsibility. Not his.

I didn't sleep, not a wink, Lucy found me when she came in the next morning. Sitting in my office chair, staring blankly at the wall. She approached me slowly, as to not frighten me (she learned from the last time she snapped me out of it- spoiler alert I threw a chair through the drywall).

"Mr. Barnes." She said as softly as she could, stepping slowly over the threshold of the door. Once I didn't stir she cleared her throat, loudly but calmly.

I snapped my head into her direction, blinking rapidly. I didn't know what time it was, but the sun was almost burning my tired eyes.

"Lucy. What is it?" I said, wincing at how hoarse my voice is. The screaming shredded my voice.

"I just got here to start work. But to be blunt sir, you look shit shit." She half smiled as she shrugged. "I can get you a coffee, but I don't think coffee will properly fix this. You need a shower, actually we might need a miracle sir."

"Very funny Lucy." I half smiled, her sarcasm reminded me of Y/N.

"I know, I'm here all work!" She clapped. "But for real, I called Rumlow. He's waiting downstairs. Go shower. And go get your girl. If you fucked things up with her, I will spit in all your coffee and throw your files at you."

"Aye aye." I saluted then stood, grabbing my suit jacket. I moved as quickly as my somber form would move.

"Ugh, you smell like a distillery." Lucy made a face of pure disgust as I breezed past her.

"Wow all the compliments this morning. You're on fire this morning." I rolled my eyes as the elevator doors opened.

"Put on your battle face boss." Lucy said as she tossed me my sunglasses.

"Always do." I shrugged as the doors closed.

As the elevator descended, my back slammed into the wall. The movement made my stomach turn and my head spin. Another hangover, wonderful. I walked through the lobby as quickly as my legs could carry me. I see the car waiting outside and I practically throw myself into the back of the car.

"Morning boss. You look like shit." Rumlow said.

"As I have been told by everyone who has looked at me. Home. Rumlow." I said roughly.

He pulled off the curb without a word, the drive to my place was short. Thankfully, because I could feel how gross I looked. I muttered a small 'thanks', Y/N has rubbed off on me in regards to my manners.

I unlocked my front door and practically stomped up the stairs, unbuttoning my shirt, I started the shower. As I turned to look at myself in the mirror, I grit my jaw at how I looked. The bag under my eyes looked like bruises, my cheeks almost looked sunken. My skin was pale, and my eyes were almost grey. Quite fitting in regards to my mood. I brushed my teeth knowing Y/N wouldn't let me within 10 feet of her if she could smell the bourbon.