I Feel Again: A FourTris FanFiction

Chapter 20

TOBIAS

Eveyln still hasn't answered me. So, I demand an answer from her again.

"Why didn't you tell me about him?" I ask, louder this time.

She looks at me as if she were in shock. Her face is blank as she searches for a legitimate answer to my complicated question.

"I didn't want to hurt you... " She finally replies.

"Hurt me? Your excuse for never telling me about my brother, for leaving me with an abusive father, for letting me grow up without a mother, is because you didn't want to hurt me?" I scoff.

"Tobias... " My name surprises me. It didn't come from the person I expected it to come from. No.. It's a softer, calmer voice. As if my conscious was talking to me.

I turn my head and see Tris still standing beside me. Our fingers still entwined. She gives me a weak smile.

"Come on... You've lived 10 years without her... You can do it again." Tris gives me a considerate offer, but I don't know how I can live another 10 years with another lie like this on my chest.

I turn to look at Tris, moving my hand behind her neck. My thumb gently rubs her soft cheek and I feel the sparks of love and commitment flying through me.

"One more question, then we'll go... " I tell Tris, who nods in approval.

My body turns back to Eveyln, who looks like she's seen a ghost. Everything she's had and known for the past 10 years seemed to drain from her very body.

"One more question..." I took a deep breath and prepared myself for the response.

"Anything." She replies, desperate to get her son, I mean, her sons back.

"Does he know about this?"

A/N:

Okay, so... Some of you may be wondering why I haven't posted in a few months.

There are multiple reasons I could give you:

1. When I started writing this story, I was convinced that I wanted to become a writer. I had the passion, I had the ideas, I had the time and I had the patience. But ever since then, I have lost the passion, the ideas, the time and the patience. I honestly don't know what I want to do when I grow up anymore, but I know writings not an option. I've had writers block since Christmas. I've had extra school and more extra curricular activities. I don't have the will power to write creatively anymore. But I will try to continue on with this story until it hits 30 chapters. By then, I would know whether I can continue this story or not.

2. I have been bullied, both online and physically. In fact, I used to go to a public high school, but the bullying got so bad, that I had to switch to homeschooling... In the middle of the year. So if that's not hard enough of an adjustment, I don't know what is. I've also been cyber bullied. On Instagram, on messaging systems and even here. There's a thing called indirect bullying. It's when the bully doesn't know they're hurting someone else's feelings. To them, they could be giving you a helpful suggestion or minor criticism, but to the victim, they might be in a tough time right now. The loss of a friend might be impacting their mental state and a "minor criticism" might be the one small act of hurt that could break them... Hint hint.

3. Like I said in #2, I've lost some friends. Besides the fact that I lost all my school friends when I switched to homeschooling... I've lost countless other friends as well. I don't know if any of my readers know what "role play" is, but it'd basically like this story. A person (me) takes the character from a fictional story (ex. Tris and Tobias) and creates a life for them beyond the books and movies (this story). So, yes, I know Tobias has blue eyes, not brown eyes. And yes, I know Christina is taller than Tris. And I know I killed off and kept some characters that the book does not. But this is MY story. Not Veronica's. Not yours. Mine. Deal with it or don't read my story.

I got distracted, sorry... I needed to get that off my shoulders.

Anyways, I role play a lot. I've been role playing for almost two years now. Not as Tris or Tobias, but as Tony Stark... (Guy from Iron Man. Don't judge me because I don't judge you.) And being Tony Stark when Iron Man 3 came out brought me a lot of new friends. But over the past few months, my friends list of 20 shriveled down to 3. That's right, 3. One of which is Pepper, another is Natasha and another is another Tony (weird, I know, but we work it out.) My three friends. I've never even met these people in real life, but, they're the only ones I have left. Ever. One of those 20 friends actually... Died. She was one of my best friends. And she died because some stupid driver hit her while she was crossing the street. The driver didn't stop. I'm 16, and the stuff I've gone through is more burdensome than the average adult. Now... That sucks.

4. I'm tired. I don't mean, I'm sleepy and I need a nap. Trust me, I get my sleep. But I'm tired of the crap this world is able to give off. If anyone's seen that new Coca-Cola commercial against cyber bullying, where we can spread love and happiness instead of hate, well, it made me cry... If only it were possible to do the things Coca-Cola dreams of doing.

Well, I'm sorry you all waited months for a story update and got my sad, depressing life lecture in return. I just wanted you all to know that I didn't fall off the face of the earth or anything... I just got a glimpse of it...

I'll try to update soon. I honestly don't know. 50% of the comments I've gotten so far are all critics, spell checking and fact checking anyways. I don't care what color eyes Tobias has or how tall the characters are. I don't care if she screamed or laughed as she jumped off the roof. You want to rewrite the book, be my guest.

Happy Tobias/Tris/Tony/Thor/Thanos/Taco Tuesday. Whichever one floats your boat.

Live Well, Laugh Much, Ship FourTris!