Which life would YOU choose?

Feel Something

Bold - thoughts
Italic - talking
Bold and italic- narration/ sounds effects

Hinatas Pov
Heaving a small whimper he starts getting ready for the day. He goes about his day in a daze. Last nights dream made him extra depressed. To him it's not fair to feel such emotions only for it to be gone in a blink of an eye.

Two people but yet two different dreams plague his mind. Both loving and caring but yet no idea who they are.
"Who are you ?.. and why are you in my dreams?.."
Keeping his gaze lowered he
fully dresses himself. Making his way through the front door he grabs his headphones from his backpack.
Humming an endless tune, he scrolls until he stops dead center to pick a song to go with his mood.

"If I could choose anything
I would be good and bad one day
I would fall into love and stay
Would fall into love"

Heaving another whimper he gets lost into the lyrics on his way to school.

"And it's not fair
I keep on writing a sequel to stories
I know that are not there
I don't wanna die but I don't wanna live like this"

I want to know if my dreams will come true .. is that too much to ask?...
I don't need anything else in life I just want ... to feel .

"I just wanna feel something, I just wanna feel
I just wanna feel something, I just wanna feel
Something really real so that I can really
Feel like a person again"

For the past year I've felt nothing but loneliness and depression. Everytime I feel something, My feeling get rejected..
What's so wrong with wanting love?.

"If I am telling the truth
Watching my friends break their hearts into two
Makes me jealous, I know that it's cruel
But what can you do?"

Once again caught up in his thoughts he hadn't realized where he was walking. A small park and his favorite safe haven. He looks around after feeling the soil underneath his shoes.
A sigh escapes from his lips. Looking at his watch . Yep I am late. I guess it can't be helped .
Puffing his chest he lets out a breath and sinks into the newly cut grass.
Breathing in the smells of the park.
Soil underneath his feet and faint lavender flowers nearby.

"And it's not fair
I keep on writing a sequel to stories
I know that are not there
I don't wanna die but I don't wanna live like this"

So he does what he knows he's good at. He lets his mind wander while softly humming the soft lullaby of a song.

"I just wanna feel something, I just wanna feel
I just wanna feel something, I just wanna feel
Something really real so that I can really
Feel like a person again"

"Can you tell me a secret?
Can you tell me what's wrong with me?
I know I should be angry
But I can barely feel a fuckin' thing
Can you tell me a secret?
Can you tell me what's wrong with me?
Can you tell me what's wrong with me?"

Glancing back at his watch he grumbles. Knowing his dad is going to kill him , if he skips school. Shaking his head he grins, head still in the clouds from the dreams that have taken place. Whispering a soft sentence under his breath. Not once realizing someone's eyes were on him.
"Yes I wouldn't mind falling in love with both of you over and over again, my sweet escape."
Chuckling his grin starts to widen into a bright smile he hasn't used for a while.
Fake smiles here and there but never a real one.
Standing up he swipes his jeans from the grass and sprints towards his school.

Huff .. huff...huff.
Softly opening his classroom door he sneaks in before the teacher has a chance to give him detention.
Hearing a faint "Oi" beside his desk.
Where the hell were you?