Y/n: Am I going too far?
Tsukishima: No, no, no. You went too far about seven hours ago. Now you're going to prison.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Y/n: Why is Kenma so sad?
Yaku: They took one of those “Which Character Are You?” quizzes
Y/n: And...?
Yaku: They got Kuroo.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Y/n: If you can’t beat them, dress better than them
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tsukishima: Go to Hell
Y/n, tearing up: I wish I could
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Y/n: If there's going to be a big dramatic scene, wait until I get back.
Tanaka: Of course. I can't flip this table by myself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Iwaizumi's Mom: Hajime, what's for dinner tonight?
Iwaizumi: Tooru.
Iwaizumi: ...
Iwaizumi: WAIT.
Iwaizumi: NO.
Iwaizumi: I MEANT TOFU!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Y/n: I baked you a cake.
Sakusa: What's in it?
Y/n: My love.
Sakusa: Sorry I'm allergic.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Y/n: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Kageyama?
Kageyama: … No.
Hinata: I do!
Y/n: I know, Hinata.
Hinata: I’m sad!
Y/n: I know, Hinata.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
O
ikawa: *Gets down on one knee*
Y/n: Oh my god, it’s finally happening.
Oikawa: *Falls over*
Y/n: The poison is kicking in.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bokuto: Hey Akaashi, are you from Tennessee? 'Cause you're the only TEN I see~
Akaashi: Bokuto-san, we're in Japan-
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kageyama: Everybody shut up. *picks up phone* Hey, mom.
Yamaguchi: HIIIIIIIIII!!!!!
Hinata: Come back to bed~ ;)
Tanaka: *various sex noises*
Sugawara: Tell her I said hi!
Nishinoya: Ay! Pass the weed!
Tsukishima: *blasting out curse words*
Daichi: PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON!
Asahi: *screams then faints*
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Y/n On the outside I "skrt skrt" but on the inside I hurt hurt.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yamaguchi: Shut up, Tsukki!
Tsukishima: ...
Kageyama: Woo!
Hinata: Woo!
Kuroo: Woo!
Bokuto: Woo!
Fandom: Woo!
Tsukishima's mom: Woo! In your face!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
*ADULT AU*
Akaashi: You know those things will kill you, right?
Kenma, pouring another glass of whiskey: That’s the point.
Suna, smoking a cigarette: We’re trying to speed up the process.
Y/n: *Nods while eating raw cookie dough*
