Second to None

35. kiss (ii)

Tezuka kept calling back throughout the night and into the next day. Mayu ignored every single call. When she got sick of hearing the phone ring, she blocked his number in a fit of rage and unplugged their landline.

That same Sunday, Mayu got a text from Ryoma. Similar to the dozen or so she'd received since the celebratory dinner, he asked how she had been and if she'd be willing to see him. Instead of deleting it as she'd done before, she grabbed her phone and dialled his number.

Ryoma picked up on the first ring. "And I thought you'd go on ignoring me. It's a pleasant surprise to have you call."

"Are you back in Japan?" she asked, point-blank.

"Just got back yesterday."

"Where's Yanagi and Tezuka?"

"They're tied up with unfinished business until next week. Shouldn't you know your fiancé's schedule—"

"I have to talk to you. Meet me at Meiji Jingu."

"Why don't you meet me?"

"Fine. Where are you?"

"Home."

"Absolutely not."

"Fine, then no talk. Good-bye."

"Echizen Ryoma, don't you dare hang up."

"If you want to talk to me," he said, and she could hear a smirk forming from over the phone, "then come over. I'll text you my address."

The line went dead. Mayu knew he was making a power move because she'd called. Yet she found herself at crossroads anyways. Being alone with him was the danger she'd been trying to avoid. By taking precautions, she'd instead ruined her chances. 

Snatching up a set of house keys, Mayu put on her sunglasses and plodded downstairs: she got nothing to lose now.

A subway transfer later, Mayu got off at Azabu and followed Ryoma's directions into a quiet, tree-lined street. He lived on the thirtieth floor of a glitzy forty-story tower with two uniformed doormen and a concierge. After several turns, she found his suite at the end of the hall.

He opened the door as soon as she knocked. Mayu could tell that he'd recently combed his hair and changed into a crisp linen shirt and trousers. The inside of his apartment was freshly furnished and, with virtually no difference from a luxury hotel room, it seemed strangely unlived in.

She stood at the entryway and went no further. "Let's just get this over with. I'll talk from here."

Ryoma appeared nonplussed. "What do you mean 'get this over with'?"

"I want to make it clear in person that I want nothing to do with you," she said flatly. "I'm not interested in your feelings or whatever game you're trying to play. Stay out of my life before you destroy it for good."

This took him completely off guard. "You call me out of nowhere and storm into my place only to throw a temper tantrum? What are you so angry about, anyway? You're the one who ignored me for two months!"

"And you ruined my career!" she screamed. "If not for you, I would've gone to Germany with Tezuka, helped Yanagi and impressed the Minister for a second time! I missed my shot, and now, I won't go anywhere professionally and the association probably won't even ask me to come back in the fall! All this happened thanks to you!"

"What does any of this have to do with me?!"

"Because I declined to go on this trip to avoid seeing you!"

Ryoma stared at her, opened his mouth, but no words came out.

"Don't give me that look as if you didn't know. If it was your plan to squirm inside my head, then congratulations—you did that and more. Working at the tennis association was my one shot at winning back my career, and you smashed it to pieces—I let you smash it to pieces! Besides the association, no other place with work in public policy will open their doors to a foreigner like me!"

When that stream of words ended, the exhaustion and fear she'd pushed down for months broke through. Dropping her head into her hands, Mayu started crying uncontrollably even though her mind shrieked for her to stop, turn around and take these tears somewhere else.

While she sobbed, she felt Ryoma putting his arms around her and pressing her head close to his chest. He held her still and stroked her back gently while she sobbed.

When she calmed down and her breathing became steady again, Ryoma asked quietly, "You can yell at me and shout however much you like. But tell me, are you frustrated with me or the sacrifices you made to be in Tokyo?"

Mayu shook her head. "I don't want to answer that."

"Because you're scared to admit it's the latter?" he asked. "Like I told you before, I regret my decision all the time. I'm not sure I made the right choice and I try to find reasons to prove that it is every single day, even though deep inside, I'm not convinced this is the place for me. Except, I'm not sure how I can get out either. Maybe you should start admitting that to yourself, too."

"It's not the same thing. It might not be ideal, but you've already earned the reputation of a stellar athlete. You've established yourself in tennis. You are Japanese and you have a place in this society. Not me."

"You never truly establish yourself in tennis unless you win the Grand Slam title."

"You just don't get it, do you? I threw away everything for nothing. Back in Europe, I was on track, going somewhere. In this country and in my field, I'm the outsider and will always be one. Doors aren't open to me or even accessible."

"So why don't you get out of here?" he asked. "With me?"

She straightened herself and took a step back. "Quit joking."

"I'm serious," he said, looking into her eyes. "I like you a lot, Ohara Mayu. I knew you were one-of-a-kind the moment I saw you at the Seigaku courts. Back then you refused to look at me twice because I was a freshman. When we met again nearly a decade later, you still paid no attention to me. Until now, anyway. As terrible as things turned out, I'm thrilled to hear that I was at least on your mind."

She broke eye contact. "You shouldn't be saying such things. You've got a girlfriend. She should be the only one on your mind."

"And you've got a fiancé, yet you're here anyway."

"I'll get going," she said.

When she began to spin around, he tugged her back and forced their eyes to meet. "Here you go trying to avoid me again. You like me, don't you? You were thinking of me in these past few months, weren't you? You avoided me because you know I'd see how you truly feel. Like I saw you during that dinner."

Before she could deny it, he was already kissing her. The moment he kissed her, she knew she was powerless to fight back—she'd been reliving their last kiss for months. Every nerve inside of Mayu lit up and she realized that she'd been pining for this moment. His mouth carried the heat of fire and the summer sun. He touched her face, her shoulders and the small of her back. All but instinctively, she reached for his shirt and kept him close, wishing he wouldn't stop.

Ryoma must have sensed this. His lips moved down to her neck and her collarbones. One by one, he started to loosen the buttons on her blouse and kissed along the opening of the blouse neckline. Lifting her legs off the floor, he told her to hold onto his neck as he carried her inside and shut the bedroom door.

***

a/n: probably not a surprise that this is going to happen eventually, and this is where I'm bringing out Ryoma's different/dark side. Thanks for reading and hope you're enjoying the story so far :)