(killing me would be kinder than this shit i am crying every 20 minutes please send help)
Funny Valentine woke up from his surgery after about 45 minutes of the doctor somehow extracting the correct teeth. "Where is my dinner I am ready to EAT!" "Yes, hold on, you are like pouring blood right now please lay back down-" Dr. Ferdinand pushed FV back to his pillow and shoved gauze in his mouth. He cleaned his workspace and sent Blackmore a text asking about the soup situation. "Ths sht fckn hrtths..........owwwww" Funny Valentine started crying from the pain of it all. "Right, heres some Hydrocodone, and an ice pack. You can have your soup when you arent bleeding out everywhere." "I wnt my thoup.....ahhhgdhgdgd it hrths........."
Dr Ferdinand walked to the kitchen to see Scarlett microwaving the foam ramen cup. He knew that leaked chemicals into it but didnt care enough to say anything.
"Oh~ Doctor! Is my Funny okay?? How are the teeth?" Scarlett looked up from watching the water in the cup boil over while it cooked. "Surgery was a success! He is crying from the pain but thats pretty normal. He had all 4 teeth you know! And hes demanding his soup. Where is it?" "Well, Panera shut down, so we went to Walmart, but they had nothing but this ramen and some yogurt. So Im playing housewife and cooking this for him! Ah~ Im gonna feed him like a baby and laugh at his swole up face." "Its swollen alright, a little bruised too. Hell live though." "Be honest. Did it make him ugly?" Dr Ferdinand did not confirm or deny. Blackmore walked into the kitchen and lit up seeing Dr Ferdinand. "How is he doc! Is Mr President ok?? We tried getting him soup but we didnt have much luck so we are gonna try this ramen stuff, it says its a soup so I think itll totally be fine. Will he make it to the firework show?? Ohhh, is he all swollen and ugly though? I dont know if the people want to see him like that!!" "He can see the fireworks from the window if he isnt completely knocked out by then. Be quiet around him, hes cranky right now. That means keeping the children outside all night." "Aye Aye Mr Doctor! Will do!"
About 10 minutes later Scarlett and Blackmore decided to try and check in on their beloved Mr President. "Hiii Funny! How do you feel? You look so silly right now with that swole up face of yours! Hehe!" Scarlett pretended to poke at poor Valentines swollen cheeks. "I fll lke deathh......ugh.......hurths......." He rolled his head around and cried. "Oh, WOW, Mr President! You look, uh, so great!" Blackmore tried not to cry at the sight in front of him. Funny Valentine kind of looked like this.
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(lmfao thanks to ranchranch1 for that image idea, ❤❤❤)
"Well, when you feel a little better, well feed you your soup! Is this kind okay? All of the Paneras in the country have shut down..." "THEY WHATH" Funny Valentine flew up for a second and immediately fell right back into the pillow, now crying because his favorite restaraunt was closed. "I knooow~~ I wanted a freakin bread bowl and I was so mad seeing it was closed! And then Walmart didnt have your cute little alphabet soups either! Gahhh.....This was the best we could do sweetie!" Scarlett frowned and presented the... most cafeteria food looking ramen probably ever made. "Get tht outh of my sthite......disthgusthing......wahhh...." FV tried to flick the ramen out of his wifes hands. She looked very upset. "You dont like my cooking??? Whyyyyyyy~!!! I made it for youuu!" She pouted and walked away, holding the ramen like it were her own child. "Well, uh," Balckmore rocked back and forth on his feet, "we grabbed the last yogurt too, if you want that. Its vanilla flavor, Ill feed it to you!" "im lacthosthe intolleranth....youfool! Throw it all away.........." Dr Ferdinand knocked on the open door and came back in. Axl followed behind looking just SO thrilled to be there, Mike after him. "Its time to change your gauze~! Oh, Blackmore, why was Scarlett crying into the ramen?" "Uh....Wasnt up to Mr Presidents standards....he doesnt want yogurt either. Me and Ringo will have to cook up something from.. the pantry." Everyone in the room looked at each other frightened by 'the pantry'. Nobody had opened that thing in probably 10 years! "Ah..good luck. Godspeed my boy. Now shoo! Im teaching Axl and Mike here a bit of a nursing crash course! Go on. Scram." Dr Ferdinand waved Blackmore out of the room. "Why do I have to do this. You know Im squeamish around blood! No fair." Axl crossed his arms and looked away from the unfortunate sight infront of him. "How the heck are you squeamish? Werent you in an entire war???" "Shut up balloon boy. I dont wanna do this!" Mike made a sound akin to that of a balloon deflating. "Allrighty boys. Heres your task. The president here is going to need that gauze in his mouth changed every couple of minutes until his bleeding stops. Make sure he has some water to drink but NO. STRAWS! If he tries to hit you or something hit him ba- I mean just be patient!!!! Be patient with him, hes in a very fragile state right now. Now if you dooont mind me-" Dr Ferdinand plucked the teeth from the tray and what looked like..a baggy with a locket of Valentines hair? "....Ill be taking these. To um, put away for medical records of course. Toodle Ooh!" He then skidaddled out of the door leaving the lads alone. "This sucks. You grab the gauze! Thats gross." "No, I wanna be the entertainer! Im gonna make Mr Valentine a bunch of balloon animals to calm his dear little heart. You get the gauze!" "I dont want to! Its icky! Im not touching his mouth dude!" Mike and Axl started to have a little slap fight right then and there. "Ill do ith mysthelf....bratsths....." FV pulled the soaked gauze out of his mouth and...dribbled a little bit. "OH my god eww ew ew ew!" Axl jumped up and down and a little girl jumproping. "Get a-a-a- a bucket! Mike!!!" "I am I am! Man, why didnt Ferdinand just hire a real nurse??? Do we have to give him medicine too?" "Aaah, I dont know! Give him the spit buckettttt ew!!!" "Sthop acthing like a baby! Itsth justh blood!" FV spit into the bucket and put his own new gauze in. He rolled his eyes at the two full grown men acting like little girls. "Now make me...a balloon.....eagle........." The muffled request delighted Mike. "Right away! Axl, maybe Ill teach you how to make some balloon creatures too!" Now the two of the were giggling like schoolgirls together.
