Deserve | Na Jaemin ✓

𝟚𝟠 | i like you

Jaein nods understandingly. Hyejin passes them, not even sparing any of them another glance. Even though Jaemin knows that he should fulfill Hyejin's wishes to be alone, the malaise feeling grows and he squeezes through between the crowds and calls that people directed at him, his attention only on the girl's sunken back figure. Reaching a more isolated part of the hallway, Jaemin clutches the girl's backpack, desperate for her attention.

Hyejin stumbles back, unaware of the presence that trailed her. At first, her heart grew with the expectation that maybe he wanted to see her but his jacket in her bag proved her otherwise, "Ah..." Hyejin voice out and hands him the pink blazer that once gave her warmth and protection, "This is yours. Thank you for lending it to me." Hyejin gives a simple smile and walks away again.

"Hyejin."

Ignore him.

"Park Hyejin!"

Jaemin slowly loses his patience and Hyejin could hear that with his call.

What do you want from me, Na Jaemin? Why can't you just leave me and my heart alone?

Relieved that Hyejin stopped walking, Jaemin runs over to her. He is afraid of touching her, worried that deep inside it could be the reason why she is avoiding them.

"Is it me?" Jaemin's palm rests on his chest, "You can speak truthfully."

"I am speaking truthfully, Jaemin. It's not you, nor is it anyone. It's just me." My dark thoughts and I, "Don't think bad about yourself when all you've done is nothing but good."

"Then...why?"

"I guess I've just decided on something."

"What is that 'something'? Hyejin you look as if you wouldn't come back to us."

"I'm better off alone." I want you all in my life but I'm scared that you would throw me away first. I have to do myself this one favour. Hyejin shrugs like it was no big deal.

The words that came out of her mouth affected Jaemin a lot. Like, a lot, "Hyejin, what's going on? Did Friday really mean nothing to you?"

Hyejin lets her tears fall, wanting to deny it wholeheartedly, "It was fun while it lasted, I guess."

"Hyejin--"

"Jaemin." With the last bit of courage that she had left, Hyejin lets out the words that would keep Jaemin awake for countless nights, "We only started talking because of the project. Now that it's over, I think we can just go back to our own separate lives."

"What? Hyejin, you're a part of my life now." The look of despair in Jaemin's eyes made Hyejin cower.

"You know that favour that you owe me?" As if he knew where this was going to go, Jaemin shakes his head, denying the reality in front of him, "Please stay away from me."

Hyejin knows just how stubborn this is.

She knows just how stubborn she is.

But the words that her mother and father said to her did not stop repeating in her head and Hyejin would always dwell on it until the sun rose up the next day. Hyejin wanted to save herself.

Na Jaemin is everything that she isn't.

Even though it hurt for her to say those words to him, she knows that he has so many supportive people around him. Even though Jaemin is the person that made her feel special and that no one could replace him, she knows that Jaemin would be able to find a better person and to treat them the same way that she would treat him. God everything hurts right now. It hurts like hell. Everything would just go back to life before the project; before Jaemin would ask Hyejin to be his partner, before Jaein and Jeno became her friends, before Hyejin would enter and leave the school with the brightest smile ever since she was born.

"Two years."

"What?"

"That's how long it took for me to finally talk to you." Hyejin understood what he was referring to but she couldn't be weak right now, "Don't do this to me, Hyejin. I'll do anything but stay away from you."

Hyejin's cries intensified and Jaemin couldn't handle it anymore but to pull her out of the hallway into an empty classroom. He hugged her tight, knowing that something was definitely wrong. He hugs the broken girl in his arms, her nose inhaling the sweet and calming aroma that Jaemin always emitted.

When Hyejin calmed down, she lightly pushed her face away from Jaemin's chest. Seeing Jaemin up close like this would've normally made her heart felt as if she just ran a marathon. But right now, the sight of him made her calm down as she rethought her decisions only to once again be reminded of not only her parents' words but Aerin as well.

Unconsciously, Hyejin pushes Jaemin away even more. A gasp escaped her lips when she realised her actions, "I-I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you met someone like me. I'm sorry that you had to work with someone like me. I'm sorry that I even exist in this world. I'm sorry, I'm so so so--"

Jaemin lowers his face to nuzzle into her neck, his warm breath hitting her pale skin, "Don't you dare continue. Don't."

"Why are you so insistent to be with me? Why can't you just leave me alone?" Hyejin tries to push Jaemin away from her. Jaemin holds a tight grip on shoulders.

"You really want to know why?"

Do I? Will it make me feel any better? What if he tells me that it's for entertainment like they had said? What if--

"I like you, Park Hyejin."