When is it my turn kalluto story

Strange

The troupe had successfully found the nen exorcist. Though me and Zafira were very bored throughout the time we spent at greed island. We did some really interesting things while there though like we went swimming and that was weird because I had never gone before we also had gone to get dinner with machi and shizuku.

I heard that Gon and Killua had completed greed island and I was a little proud of them. I had also not been on my phone for a while if I had to say a estimate of how long I had not been on it it would probally be around four weeks.

After about seven weeks at greed island we left and got back to the phantom troupe base. Where I decided to check my phone and I was surprised with the amount of notifications I had received from Illumi but I just ignored him because I still am angry at him for everything he did. "What are you doing?" Zafira asked while looking over my shoulder to see my phone. "Nothing at all." I responded. Zafira walked away after that and sat down across the room.

I looked at the time and it said it was one in the morning so I put my phone down and fell asleep.
                     [IN DREAM]
Mother was standing in-front of my door to my room which I was inside. She entered my room and illumi walked in behind her. "You left us again! How many times will you leave us kalluto?! You are such a useless child I cannot believe you left! You are here now that's all that matters though and you will never leave again I'll make sure of it kalluto." Mother said bitterly and illumi was just standing behind her with pins in his hand.

I knew what was about to happen but I gave up at trying. I couldn't feel anything but empty ness.

               [END OF DREAM]
I awoke covered in sweat and shaking. Zafira just sat watching me shake and she started laughing at me. I looked over at her and I could hear her say to Feitan "look at that idiot shaking doesn't he know it's just a dream. I can't believe he is so weak." Feitan just stood there watching me. I looked down and I felt my heart drop.

"Kalluto do you want to look around with me?" Zafira called excitedly out and she was acting like she didn't just say what she did. I nodded and walked over to her and she took my hand and started walking with me. We were walking for a little bit and we got into a room. I tripped on some debris on the ground and fell over. "OH MY GOD!! You are so stupid how could you not see that! I don't understand how you could be so weak!" Zafira yelled at me and she kicked me over when I was starting to get up.

"I'm sorry it's my fault I am sorry I am not good enough." I responded quietly and looked down at the ground. "It is your fault you are so useless I don't understand how anyone can love you!" She said bitterly and she grabbed my hand and helped me up. "I know." Was all I could say. "I love you kalluto. I am the only one who loves you, you would be nothing without me." She said hugging me.

"I love you to." I said while hugging her back. She says that to me but she loves me and I love her to because without her I cannot feel happiness. She said herself without her I would be nothing and I just want to be something. As well as she has just recently been acting like this so there is a possibility that she will be back to normal soon.

We walked out of the room and went back to the main room where she started acting like she used to.