Split String of Fate:(Killua x Reader x Kurapika)

~Leave it to Fate~

        Y/n's POV:

        'I am a horrible, heartless, dumb, stupid person. I don't even deserve to be living right now...' You though pessimistically. Okay, maybe you were over exaggerating, but you did feel pretty horrible and guilty. How could you have done that to him? 

        *Flashback*

         "Y/n, I love you. Would you be my girlfriend?" Kurapika asks leaning a little bit closer to you.

         "I-" You stutter your cheeks flush red. Your heart was about to explode out of your chest, you couldn't take it. "EXCUSE ME!" You scream a little too loudly as you run to the washroom and slam the door. You couldn't face Kurapika, you couldn't face anyone. It was all too much to take in, and it didn't help that everyone was staring at you. You sit on the edge of the bath tub and hang your head. 

        'Kurapika likes me... Shouldn't I be happy about that? I mean, I like him too don't I? I'm pretty sure I do...Then why am I acting like this. Why am I not jumping for joy? The most perfect boy, the one I've known for so long, like me back. I feel happy, I feel relieved, I want to jump into his arms and say, "yes!" and be his girlfriend, but there's more. A part of me is sad. A part of me doesn't want to say yes... A part of me won't let me be happy. Why is that?'

        "Y/n, Are you okay?" Someone was knocking on the door, whom you recognized to be Killua. 

        "Please, just leave me alone... I need some time to think..." You say covering your face with your hands. 

        'Killua came to check on me...Killua...Killua...' The thought of Killua checking up on you made you feel giddy inside. 'Wait... Does a part of me likee Kurapika and the other like Killua... How is that possible?! Why can't I just like one? Why did it have to be like this. Things would be so much easier if I could just love Kurapika back whole heartedly, I want to be able to do that! But why must part of me be so reluctant to say yes. UGHHH I'M SO CONFUSED!' 

        *End of flashback*

        Ever since you couldn't face Kurapika. Just looking at him made your heart race and also break at the same time. Being near him flooded your mind with thoughts and questions, you felt like your brain was going to explode. But most of all, you couldn't face him because you always felt this immense amount of guilt every time he was nice to you.  You couldn't help but feel like you didn't deserve his kindness and were hurting him. You knew you were, but you weren't ready, you didn't have your thought straight yet. You couldn't answer him yet, you needed time. 

        You were now on a blimp to the next phase. You all escaped the trick tower, just barely though. If it hadn't been for Gon's idea to break into the short and easy path near the end, you'd never have made it. You were sitting alone on a couch in front of one of the large blimp windows, watching the clouds pass by as you waited for the blimp to land. You were avoiding the group, because wherever they were, he would be there too. You felt terrible doing this, but it was the only way for you to think straight and sort out your thoughts. 

        "Hey Y/n!" You hear a familiar voice say. 

        "Hey Gon..." You say automatically, in instinct.

        "Where have you been? Why are you here alone?" He asks. 

        "Because, I need some time alone..." You say hoping he'll take the hint that you wanted him to leave. You loved Gon, but right now, you needed some alone time. 

        "Ehh? But being alone is boring, come to the room, everyone's there." 

        "No thank you Gon..."

        "Are you okay?" He questions, taking a seat beside you on the couch. 

        "..." 

        "Is it about earlier? With Kurapika?"

        "..." 

        "Please talk to me!" Gon pleads with his puppy dog eyes and you stupidly look deep into them. His eyes stare into your very soul. Your eyes start to twitch as tou try your hardest to fight his stare, but you just couldn't. No one could fight his adorable gold-brown eyes. 'Damnit Gon! You know I can't say no to your puppy dog eyes.' You curse to yourself. You sigh heavily and look at your feet.
        "I'm confused, alright? I don't know how to respond to what he said. It's not that I don't like him, back, I do, but...I'm just confused." 

        He nods in understanding and smiles. 

        "I wish I could happily accept him and be with him. I honestly wish I could, but it's not that simple. Something doesn't feel right about saying yes, or about saying no. If I say yes without being sure and it all ends badly, I'll lose a dear friend. But if I say no, or keep doing what I'm doing, the same thing will happen. I'm at crossroads here, and if I go the wrong way, I'll end up hurting someone I care so much about." A tear falls down your cheek and you quickly swipe it away.

        "Hey, do you believe in fate?" He asks you. You are surprised by his question, you shrug. You were in-between about this whole fate thing. You liked to believe in it, it's a beautiful concept, but somethings are just too important to leave to fate. 

        "Well, my Aunt Mito told me a story. She says that we all have a certain someone we are destined to be with. She says that we're all connected to our soul-mates by something called, The Red String of Fate. The string connects your pinkies together and no matter how far apart you are, your soul-mate could be on the other side of the world! You will find your soul-mate eventually. Things will work out if they're meant to be." 

         'Things will work out if they're meant to be, eh?' You ponder on this thought, 'Can I really leave things up to fate? What else can I do?' 

        "Gon, I don't think I can leave this to just fate." You say sadly. "It's not just my feelings I'm putting at risk. I have to deal with this and I can't just leave it to some unproven force."

        "You don't have to deal with it alone either. Whatever it is we're here to listen and help. We're your friends above everything else, just please don't avoid us. We don't want you to be sad." Gon says grabbing your hand. You look down at the young boy squeezing your hand and you smile. 'He's been really worried, hasn't he?' 

        "You're right... I'm sorry for worrying you Gon. Let's go back to the others." You and Gon hug and head back to the others. You're heart pounded as you anticipated seeing Kurapika again, but you knew you couldn't keep avoiding him. You knew you shouldn't.

        'Red String of Fate... I wish mine would just appear and Icould pull on it until my soul-mate comes to me by them-self, it would make things so much easier...'

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        The last part, I feel the same way :P I find the whole red string of fate really cute and I love to believe that everyone has someone out there for them! 

        Thank you guys for all of the support! I love writing for such amazing readers! I love you guys <3

~Callie