There goes any chance of happiness I ever had... "He's Angelica's brother." That means that he's probably the exact same way with women that his sister is with men. If he's even straight. The only person I've ever felt drawn to is gay!
Wait a minute, let's think clearly here; I don't need a relationship in the first place. I've got a career to worry about. A college degree. A life I have to plan.A lonely life.
"Yeah, what she said." I mumbled out loud in the middle of my own internal argument. That caused my mother to turn around, the sweet little short and plump lady she is, and began to scold me. "What have I told you about talking to yourself? It's weird, Alexandria. You're never going to find a man if you're talking to yourself. You're going to be that little old lady in the grocery store with no friends that just mumbles to herself all day long. Is that how you want to be?" She held up a whisk and slung some marinara sauce on my cheek before looking down and throwing basil into the pot of red goodness. "Do you want to be the old lady at the grocery store that no one talks to because she's creepy?"
"I talk to Old Lady Paula all the time!" She turned her back to me but not before she whispered 'exactly' and began writing down a note on the calendar. "We've gotta make you an appointment with Dr.Fritz for tomorrow."
I sighed heavily.
Dr.Fritz is my psychologist/general practitioner. She started giving me a shot about once a year, since I was a child, to get rid of the voices I hear in my head. Each year, though, the shots get way more frequent. I had a six month gap before my last one and now it's only been three weeks and I have to have another one. It's getting old faster and faster with every appointment.
————————————————————————I actually made it to my first class early enough that I got to pick where I sat with absolutely no one else in the classroom. After choosing the perfect seat, I pulled out all the tools I would need for the class, and then pulled my phone out so I could text Safiya.
"What's his name?" I sent the first text.
"U R NOT DATING HIM!!!!"
"I'm don't plan on it but I'd like to know the guys name."
"Ur gona stalk him?"
"Oh for heavens sake, Safiya. I want his name."
"Nicholas." I heard the name rumble into my ear, the breath of that oh so familiar voice tickling my earlobe. I felt my face flush a bright red as chills ran down my spine. I swallowed really hard, trying to give the Sahara desert that was my throat a small yet unfulfilling bit of moisture.
'I've gotta go. Class.' I sent the text back and turned off my phone, placing it screen down on my desk. "Who is 'Bestie' sounds like a foreign dog breed. Is it Australian?" I stiffened like a board. There was a small amount of hope that maybe it was just a voice in my head, even though I could feel his breath on my ear and neck but not when he's asked a second question. "Uh... it's a nickname." I said as I turned around with the worst nervous smile he's probably seen in his life. That's okay. Seeing his perfect face framed by his trimmed beard and perfect hair... oh my goodness. I'm obsessed. Too obsessed.
My heart was beating out of my chest, I was watching his lips move and smile and his eyes. Oh my gosh his eyes. They were like honey mixed with the most beautiful forest green I have ever witnessed in my life. Don't even get me started on those eye lashes, any girl in her right mind would beat a monk for them. Hell, she'd become a monk for them, if they even allow that. I have one question and only one question left. Who let this absolutely stunning man escape heaven?
I felt a heat wave hit me from my shoulders, pulsating through my entire body like I was being melted alive. The entire room started shaking back and forth before I was engulfed in the smell of a flower meadow that had to be in the middle of the forest somewhere. It was earth but smelled like absolute heaven. I wanted to wrap myself in the smell and never escape it. Then everything went black.———————————————————————
I woke up in a solid white room, the lights beaming down on my frozen skin, watching my trembling body as it fought to give me even the slightest bit of relief from the cold. I sat up on the bed and pulled the blankets tightly around myself when I noticed a Manila folder sitting on the small white table sitting next to my bed. Picking the folder up, I read the name written on it a few times, just to make sure I wasn't reading it wrong. My eye site was the worst it's ever been after seeing Dr.Fritz and the last time I couldn't leave the house for three days because any exposure to light would make everything go black.
I opened the folder labeled 'Alexandria Lynn Stone' and dropped it almost immediately. "Adoption papers." I mumbled to myself. "My parents aren't my real parents."
"No, they're not. Why do you think they've always favored your siblings over you?" I heard a soft chuckle from the other side of the room. "Why do you think you're such an outcast, little girl!" I turned around as quickly as I could without causing more pain to my already aching bones to see Angelica sitting in the only chair in my hospital room, sucking on a lollipop as she crossed her leg over the other .
"Why do you think you have no friends, Orphan girl?" I scoffed. "What the hell do you want?" She cackled manically. "You think Nick is cute?" I couldn't hold back my reaction in this state and she just laughed louder when I looked at her in complete shock. How and the hell does she know? SAFIA! "You honestly think you can pass out in my brothers arms and me not find out the whole story?" She scoffed at me and gave her hand a 'shoo' wave. "Of course you do, you actually thought you would've had a chance with him." She stuck her lollipop back in her mouth long enough to stand up and walk closer to me, pulling it back out of her mouth with an echoing 'pop!'
She stood right at the edge of my bed, looking down at me with a slight hint of pity on her face. "To think, you didn't even know you were adopted until your 'parents' were sick of putting up with you, handed you the papers, and left a little note in there." She pointed to the envelope before she reared back and struck me in the side with her fist.
The absolute blood curdling scream I let out didn't even come close to expressing the amount of pain that shot through me. It was like white fire had been injected into my veins and I had just taken a shell from a hellcat to the side. As if it wasn't enough, she rammed her fist back into my side. I could feel the air leave my lungs, the one she had struck filling with a burning hot liquid. She then slowly stepped around the bed and picked up the letter off the floor before reading it in her highest pitched voice."Dear Alexandria,
We're sorry that we never told you this. We never wanted you to know but your needs, your expenses, are getting too costly. We've got to send our biological children to school and we simply cannot afford to pay for yours and save for their tuition while we're being forced to pay for all these medical bills. We also can't have you losing your mind around our children so, we're kicking you out. You're 20 now and you have a job. You won't have the best life without education but you should be able to live off of your diner job if you get another one with all the free time you have now with no college. Have a great life, Andria.
Best wishes,
Carolynn and Jack Corbin."I have no idea which hurt worse, the pain from my ribs, the pain of the letter, or the pain of knowing that everything Angelica said was true. A stray tear rolled down my cheek, landing on my already soaked hand. "Pathetic." She laughed at me almost hysterically. "Stay the hell away from my brother." With that, she landed her fist in the side of my face, the tears instantly welling up in my eyes. "Time to finish this once and for all." She smiled crookedly before she landed one to my chest.