Delusional

Chapter 2

There was sudden knock on the door

"Haze...Dinners ready." Soda said

"I'll be there in a minute!" I said in a fake enthusiastic voice.

I quickly hid my switchblade under my mattress, grabbing some band aids covering the new wounds all over my body.

I looked at myself in the mirror, I looked dead.

My face was pale, My Honey Hazel eyes sunken, my dirty blonde hair was all tangled up and my cheekbones more visible due to the lack of food.

I slipped on my raven black  hoddie that used to be Ponyboys and hurried into the dinning room.

As I played with my food not really wanting to eat, Darry decided to start some small talk.

"So...Ponyboy, Hazel how are your grades holding up?" He asked

"Mine are good, Mr.Shymes says I can get a scholarship with all of the writing I do, I can get myself into a college of literature." Ponyboy said proudly

"Oh that's great!" Darry patted him on the shoulder

"How about you Haze?"

I stood there silently, I pulled the strings of my sweatshirt, make the hood tighten to hide my face.

"Hazel..."

"All F's." I said coldly "How come?" He asked

"I'm busy." I sighed

"Busy working a nine to five job? Busy worrying about paying the bills?" Darry's voice stated to rise not taking my attitude.

"Well I'm sorry that I'm such a disappointment to you Darry!" I yelled

"I never said that! It's just-Why can't you have good grades like Ponyboy!"

"Now Darry don't bring me into this." Ponyboy shook his head

"Shut up Pony!" He looked back at me

"Darry..." Soda warned

"Huh Hazel? What do you do that takes so much of your damn time that you can't study or do your homework!? All you do is sit around locked up in your room all day!"

I got up and walked away tears falling down my face. I slammed my door and burried my face to my knees.

No one understands-No one ever will.

It's not fair how everyone around me can be smiling and laughing without even coming by and asking me if I'm alright.

How can No one notice the tears in my eyes? How come no one looks deep inside of me and realize what I'm going through?

There was a soft knock on the door, it slowly creaked open to reveal Sodapop and Ponyboy.

"Hey Haze...You alright?" Ponyboy asked as they both sat beside me.

I didn't awnser

"I'm sure Darry didn't mean to yell at you...He just wants the beat for you...You know?" Soda tried to put his arm over my shoulder but I quickly got up.

"Leave me alone." I blankly said

"But Ha-"

"Leave me alone!"

Ponyboy and Soda looked at eachother and sighed

"Alright...We'll let ya be"

They both walked out of the room.

I closed the door and locked it this time slowly sliding against the wall as I banged my head against the wall.

But it's not their fault...I'm the one who hides this from them, I'm the one who backs away from them when they try to see what's wrong, I'm the problem.

I gusse I'm nothing but a burden, I'm such an awful Sister.

But it's not easy to tell them what's going on with me.

It's hard. There are days when I don't wanna tell them and days when I do.

But, I don't know how to! I know someday they'll figure it out soon either it's  gonna be right on time or to late.