Bubbles Inside a Fish Tank

To : Lana

It's been hard for you, I know. There are things in life that make you too hard on yourself, and the way it tortures you is so unimaginable painful. You might think of yourself as nothing but a failure.

It was painful to see that no one seem to see the pain through those eyes. It breaks me apart when I realize that no one could understand you. Sorry, that this stranger, could see how heavy your heart is. How comforting the sadness for you might be. How afraid your heart is to accept happiness.

But, I'll tell you something, Na. You did alright. Your annoying smile does brighten up someone's world. The way you eat so happily even I knew things might be hard for you lately, makes me feels alive. You deserve to wake up in the morning and feel like you're the greatest person in this world. You deserve to feel every fucking second alive in this lifetime. You might not be perfect, but you're not a mistake either. You deserve to be loved.

It's not your fault if you can't change the past. It's not your fault that the demons take over your beautiful heart one time. You're not a bad person either, so stop distancing yourself from others, stop pushing down yourself. You deserve someone to talk to, that's why I'm here, right?

And don't you dare to think that you are a burden to me. You know I like you a lot. You matter, Na. You are worthy. You are loved. You deserve a friend, someone to listen to all your crap. You deserve to smile, so let the world know how beautiful your laugh is. You deserve all the things you wanna be. You deserved to be alive.

You're much stronger than you think. Remember, no matter how harsh that tragedy hits you in the past, you didn't leave your spot on this world, even if you want to. You belong here, even though sometimes you might doesn't feel like it. No matter what mistake you made, no matter what kind of past you have, you deserve to stay in this world. And I am happy to hear your heartbeat.

You can let go for today, I got you, you can cry your heart out as much as you want, but don't let it tear you down.

Please forgive yourself.

This world needs someone like you. You shine in your own way. You're beautiful, Na. You're not alone, I'll always be with you.

***

Notes:

Halo! Entah udah lewat berapa tahun ya sampe akhirnya aku bs re-pub cerita ini lagi. Dan krn cerita ini udah di-publish ulang, maka aku akan kembali aktif di Wattpad buat posting cerita ini sampe tamat! 

Kalau kamu dulu sempet jadi pembacaku, maka long time no see. Tapi kalau kamu pembaca yang baru, semoga kamu betah dan suka dengan tulisanku ya ^^

Curcol dikit dulunya cerita ini aku tulis pas aku lagi stress berat. pas dipertengahan aku lagi nyusun plot cerita, aku ngerasa kaya stressku kok makin berat gara2 kebawa2 cerita Lana sama Cakra ini dan sampai akhirnya aku memutuskan buat istirahat sebentar --yang akhirnya malah keterusan-- biar nggak makin stress. Sekarang, kondisiku udah semakin baik. Aku juga udah bisa dan siap buat nulis cerita ini sampai tamat. Doain aja biar perjalananku lancar dan tulisan ini bisa tereksekusi dengan baik ya.

Aku sebenernya khawatir banget takut gaya tulisanku berubah krn beneran udah lama banget ga nulis. Tapi semoga aja tulisan ini ga sampe bikin kamu sakit mata yaa. Kalau ada masukan / saran tentang tulisan ini, boleh langsung dikomen aja atau disampaikan ke aku via DM. Oh iya, just in case kamu belum notice, tokoh utama cerita ini 2-2 nya cowok, dan ini bukan romance ya genrenya hahahahah. 

The one who love u,

Mel

p.s. special thanks to @/mak_oktavia for this gorg cover <3