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Teganjames : some photos from todays shoot
I get up from the bed and i head down stairs
Tegan; dec Dec ; i thought u left already Tegan; i was about to but I'm not now what the fuck declan
I take the bottle of pills out of his hands
Dec : give them back Tegan; no theses aren't your pills Dec ; tegan seriously give me them back Tegan : why do u have theses Dec ; none of your business just give them back Tegan ; tell why u have them Dec ; i can't take this i can't go throw this again i saw what this disease done to my nan i can't see my mom go throw that. I can't slowly watch my mom disappear Tegan : so what your gonna end it your going to leave lav alone Dec ; she will have u and dad Tegan; I'm not u shes needs u Declan and what use is your dad gonna be when he lives on the side of the world. Dec ; i can't do this Tegan ; yes u can dec theres help there is people u can talk to Dec : i don't want to talk to anyone i want this over with give me the pills
He trys to grabbing the bottle out my hand but i move away
Tegan; I'm not letting u do this dec Dec ; please Tegan ; no Dec ; tegan u don't know whats its like losing someone u have this perfect life your parents are still together u haven't lost anyone close to u . My parents had the worst divorce and i moved in with my nan and grandad they raised me then my nan got diagnosed with alzheimer's which absolutely broke me . Not even 2 days after she got diagnosed my granddad died which left me to look after my nan and day by day i watched her disappear. And then she died and it broke me and I've finally got my life back together my mom got diagnosed. I can't go throw that again so go to your perfect little life and leave me the fuck alone and give me the pills Tegan ; no I'm staying Dec ; give me Tegan: no
He gets up grabbing my arm and taking the bottle out my hand
Tegan ; if u do this lav will hate u Dec ; why will i care I'll be dead Tegan; declan please don't Dec : i can't do this tegan
I hug him and he holds onto me so tight and he starts crying
Tegan ; u can do this ok u and lavender will get throw this I'll be there to help and support u both and there is people who will help and support u aswell u aren't alone . Dec : i don't want to talk to anyone Tegan ; it might help Dec ; no it i won't Tegan: talk to me Dec : no Tegan: then lav cal blake there is so many people u can talk to u need a support system. They help Dec : no Tegan ; ok Dec : i need to get away Tegan; then lets get away me and u lav is getting people to help with your mom and she doesn't want to leave her side and i don't want to leave yours . Dec ; ok where to Tegan; what about we do a road trip to Florida and we stay in my parents beach house . Or we go to England and see your dad or go anywhere u want in the world Dec ; beach house sounds nice Tegan; ok then a road trip to Florida Dec : now Tegan; now Dec ; yh i need to leave now Tegan ; ok well lets pack some things and we need tell lav Dec ; I'll call her don't tell her about the pills Tegan: only if u give me the pills
He hesitates before handing me the bottle
Tegan: thank u Dec ; I'm gonna go pack Tegan ; ok
He walks off and i go to the room I'm staying in getting my suitcase and i start packing and i call drew
Drew : where are u Tegan; i am so sorry but i have to cancel Drew : why Tegan; something came up with dec and he needs someone i might not necessarily be that person but i want to be there for him because hes going throw something at the minute Drew ; ok Tegan : I'm going to Florida with dec for a bit Drew : how long Tegan; i don't really know Drew : oh ok Tegan: it probably won't be long but we can facetime and everything Drew ; yh Tegan : I'm sorry for cancelling Drew ; no don't its ok i get it dec needs u Dec ; ready Tegan: give me a sec Dec ; ok
He walks out my room
Tegan ; i need to go but I'll call u later or tomrrow Drew ; ok be safe getting to Florida Tegan: i will be safe in general Drew ; i will try my best bye Tegan: bye
I hang up and i go to the bathroom flushing the pills down the toilet and i walk out getting my suitcase and i walk out my room
Dec ; lets go Tegan; how did lav take u going Dec ; she said maybe me getting away is a good thing so good so come on i want to go Tegan; ok then lets move
We walk out the door getting in my car and i start driving and i was so worried about dec that I'm hoping getting away will help him in a way . And maybe while we are away i can convince him to get some help
