Dangerously mine

Chapter 18- hell like

-jaylen POV-

    I open my eyes and try to adjust to the brightness of the lights. I groan in pain as I feel a shooting feeling in my stomach. My eyes still burn from the light. I look around and I just see orbs and shadows.

      It's hard to see and it's hard to hear what's happening around me. I hear someone speak in the distance "just relax" I couldn't make out the voice do to me still feeling groggy.
 
  What happened to me. I can finally see as I re adjust my position where I'm laying down I take in my surroundings.

    White sheets a beeping machine. No windows. A hospital. I'm in a hospital. A wave of worrisome settles in. My baby. I instinctively reach for my stomach. I look down to see a bandage wrapped around my waist and stomach.

      Tears begin to form at the thought of losing my baby. I feel arms wrap around me and I immediately brace in this person's arms. "Jaylen you need to relax" Thomas it's Thomas. I cry even more from the pain. "What happened to me" sobbing in his arms he begins to explain what happened.

      I almost lost my baby due to my seizures. I haven't had an episode for years. And the only trigger for mine are stress and worry. Maybe i was a little to hard on myself just maybe.

I began to cry even harder. "We'll be ok" Thomas assured me. I shake my head and the thousands of thoughts I have been avoiding for weeks fills my mind.
   
      Plagues my heart and ends my happiness. "I pushed him away, I didn't want him getting to close and I let him" Thomas nods. "You did what you thought was right and you can't blame yourself for that." My tears don't stop for the remainder of the day.

     Thomas never left my side. Assuring me that we would be ok. Assuring me we would get through this together even if it broke us in the process.

What seemed like minutes turned into hours. The thoughts stayed persistent throughout the day. Never leaving my mind.

     I pushed Parker way and I didn't give him an explanation. He didn't deserve to be treated the way I had treated him. He's an angle and I'm simply the devil himself.

      I was once an angel like him but fell to my Demise when I got lost in a hell like world. He needed to stay pure and lovable. I want him to stay himself.

      I don't want him to Change who he is for me. I don't want him thinking for me as a murderer. That's why I had to push him away.

My reasons may not be valid in your eyes but in mine Parker deserves much more than a broken me. He gave me his heart and I returned it broken just like me.

      With the thoughts plaguing my mind and soul I fell into the darkness once again letting sleep consume me.

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A/N: hey guys!! Sorry for not uploading in a while I just have lots of things going on rn. I promise I'll upload a longer chapter

-XxX