Take My Breath (KShaw)

Chapter 15

Harry leaves for home a little earlier than he'd planned. Technically all his exams are done, but he was planning on leaving Friday, since that was the day Ethan and Tobi were both heading home. But when he wakes up Tuesday morning, not exactly early but not late, since they don't have to be in the art room for another few hours, to find paint still caked under his nails, he can't breathe.

When JJ gets up a little later, after Harry's showered and dressed for the day, and he says, "Hey, think I could talk to you tonight? After the auction?" Harry feels like he's being suffocated. Like JJ's wrapped those hands of his, with the long, thick fingers, tightly around Harry's throat. "Talk about what?" Harry asks, careful to keep his tone neutral. JJ shrugs. "Just something. I'll get your number off Simon and text you." Harry goes to protest, but there's really no reason to, is there? Not one, aside from the heavy weight on Harry's chest. "Okay." JJ nods and Harry grabs his phone and turns it up so he can pretend to ignore JJ until they have to be in the art room to set up their stuff. But Harry's never been very good at ignoring JJ, and now is no exception.

Especially when he gets out of bed, completely naked. There's still a bit of paint on certain parts of his skin, little swatches, reminders of what happened. He heads for his dresser, and Harry bites his lip, pointedly not looking at his ass except- okay, he does. Fuck. Slowly, JJ pulls on his boxers. He does it deliberately, tugging them up his legs with a little twist of those hips. Harry's eyes narrow, his head cocking to the side, and JJ reaches for a pair of pants, does the same thing, buttoning them painstakingly slow. He forgoes the shirt, heading back for his bed once he's done. He falls onto it, grabbing his phone from on top of the desk, and then he lies there like that, propped up on his side, looking fucking ridiculous. Ridiculously attractive, but Harry doesn't want to think about that. So he gets out of bed, leaving his headphones on, and leaves the room.

Ethan and Tobi are still asleep when Harry gets to their room. Ethan answers the door in only a pair of boxers, rubbing sleep out of his eyes. "What?" he sighs. "What do you want? It's too early for me to like you right now. Come back later." Harry pushes into the room anyway.

Tobi is half awake in bed, rubbing at his eyes like Ethan had. Only he tries to smile weakly at Harry, which Ethan hadn't bothered, and he also doesn't kick Harry out. So Harry crawls into bed beside him, getting right under the blankets and everything. Tobi's bed smells like him; like that cologne he wears every day. Harry tucks his head against Tobi's chest and breathes it in while Tobi rubs at his back, not even asking what he's doing, which is why Harry had come here for him, not Ethan. Ethan would ask; Tobi just comforts automatically and lets him work it out on his own.

"I shouldn't have slept with my roommate," Harry groans against him. "You definitely shouldn't have," Tobi agrees. "I think I like him." Harry pulls back, looking up at Tobi with pleading eyes, begging Tobi to tell him that's not true; Harry can't like JJ. Nope. Impossible. Incomprehensible. But Tobi only nods sympathetically. "We know." "How did this happen?" Harry wonders. "How did I let this happen?" "I don't think you had much say in it," Ethan says from the other bed. "He's kind of great, when you get to know him, Harry. And he's fucking gorgeous. Like, straight out of GQ material." "You're not helping," Harry grumbles. "And I hate him, remember? I hate him. I'm afraid to not hate him. What happens if I don't hate him? Then what?" "You're already fucking," Ethan points out. "You're halfway there." "Halfway to what?" "A relationship."

Harry gets out of Tobi's bed and stumbles towards the door. A relationship with JJ. God, he can't even think about that. Not even if- no. He can't. It can't happen. It can't work. And Harry's feelings possibly changing doesn't mean that JJ's have. Why would his? What does Harry have to offer him except sex, really? Nothing. "Don't leave," Tobi calls after him. "Harry!"