Terrible Twos: Threes a Blessing before the Blessing

3

"Sapnap." Karl said softly, tracing his finger along the sides of Sapnaps face. "Will you marry me."

"No." Sapnap replied, and Karl frowned.

They had a good month. No fights, hand holding on stream and Sapnap even drafted a coming out text to his mother. Sapnap had hoped the progress would get them close to marriage.

"Please?" He attempted, boping Sapnap would cave since he was tired.

"We're not ready." Sapnap muttered, pressing a soft kiss to Karls palm.

"I think we are." Karl huffed, squishing Sapnaps lips together. "This is the happiest month we've had."

"Something is still missing." Sapnap sighed.

"You're the love of my life, what else could their be?" Karl snapped. "Unless you're considering someone else."

"Hey." Sapnap warned. "Don't you date say things like that."

"Well what else am I supposed to think."

"Karl I want to do this right!" Sapnap yelled, sitting up. "I want us to be strong enough to get married."

"Are we not strong enough?" Karl stared at Sapnap with defensive eyes and Sapnap sighed.

"No we're not." He admitted. "We are not ready."

"I love you." Karl said and Sapnap rolled his eyes, leaning his head back. "Don't act like that."

"Stop acting like I don't love you because I won't marry you right now!" Sapnap begged. "Do you have any clue how that makes me feel?"

"I never said you don't love me." Karl muttered, "I just said I love you."

"But you don't love me enough to wait." Sapnap challenge. "We've been together like... Two years."

"So?" Karl challenged. "There are people that get married within a month-"

"We are not them." Sapnap interupted. "We are us."

"And what is the difference between us and them?" Karl asked.

"We are broken." Sapnap reminded him. "We have a rocky past and a cracked foundation."

Karl swallowed hard. "So what?"

"You think I want to go through a divorce with you?" Sapnap asked. "Do you have any idea how much I love you? Way too much to risk a divorce."

Karl swallowed hard. "We're fighting again."

"Because you doubt me." Sapnap reminded him. "You're always doubting me."

"I'm not doubting you." Karl grumbled, rolling his eyes.

"Then why are you so hurried to marry me?" He challenged and Karl went quiet. Sapnap scoffed, shaking his head. "You don't trust me. You want to lock me down so I can't leave you and that not a good reason to get married."

"That's not true." Karl whispered. "I just... I want to know you're actually mine forever."

"I am."

"Why don't I believe it?"

Sapnap sat back, frowning, as Karls eyes fillled with tears. "What?"

"It feels like you're waiting for someone else." Karl sobbed. "Like you're not happy with me."

"Why do you feel that way?" Sapnap asked, pulling his boyfriend close.

Karl shook a bit in his arms. "Because you keep saying that something is missing. I'm not giving you everything you want and that's scary!"

"Karl." Sapnap held him close, pressing a kiss to his temple. "My love, you're perfect. There is nothing else you could possibly give me."

"Then why aren't we in a good place?" Karl asked, sniffling and Sapnap wished he could give him the answer.

"I don't know. I'm hoping as we go, it will just work itself out. We'll work it out." He ran gentle fingers through Karls hair. "We can do this, Karl."

"Don't leave me." Karl whispered. "Please?"

"I won't." Sapnap kissed his face, wiping away Karls tears. "You're very beautiful, do you know that?"

Karl blushed darkly. "You're not getting make up sex tonight." He teased and Sapnap gasped in fake offense.

"I was not aiming for that." He insisted and Karl rolled his eyes, smiling slightly.

"Yea right you little liar." He sniffled a bit and stood up. "Come on, lets have a shower."

"Together?" Sapnap asked and Karl nodded. "Ugh, you're such a tease."

"We have two showers." Karl offered and Sapnap shook his head. "I can control myself."

"Good." Karl grabbed his hand and tugged him off the couch. "Hurry up."

Sapnap followed Karl closely.

Later that night, they laid in bed, chests pressed together. Karl had his eyes closed, trying to sleep as Sapnap stared at him, running his fingers over his face.

"I don't know how else to tell you that I want to die with you." Sapnap whispered and Karl blinked his eyes open.

"Married people die together." He attempted and Sapnap smiled.

"Yea. They do. When they get married at the right time." He brushed his thumb over Karls lips. "You make my heart flutter."

"Sapnap please." Karl sighed, blushing and pressing his face into Sapnaps neck.

"I'm serious. When you speak your voice is the only sound I hear." He wrapped Karl tightly to him. "And its like the best song I've ever heard."

Karl grumbled something about Sapnap being stupid, but welcomed the arms that trapped him in the bed.

"There's only one person that ever made me feel like this." Sapnap whispered into the darkness.

"Who?" Karl asked, his voice hesitant.

Sapnap waited a while before he answered. "Quackity."

Karl leaned back and looked up at his lover. "Quackity?"

"Yea." Sapnap admitted. "I never acted on it though."

Karl frowned. "He made me feel the same way."

Sapnap furrowed his eyebrows, pushing a curly hair off of Karls forehead. "Maybe he's our missing piece." He joked.

"We need closure. To be sure he's okay." Karl muttered. "He hasn't gotten back to us since..."

"You think he's hurt?" Sapnap asked and Karl shrugged.

"Maybe we should text him." Karl whispered. "Just check in."

"Maybe." Sapnap rolled over and grabbed Karls phone, handing him the device.

Karl took it and unlocked it, going to Quackitys contact. He quickly typed out a message, asking if his old friend was okay.

The response only took five minutes to come in.

Just checking in. How are
you doing lately? Me and
Sapnap were just talking
about you.

Can you leave me the fuck alone?

Karl frowned and Sapnap scoffed. "Never mind." Karl mumbled. "Maybe he doesn't want our help."

Sapnap watched as he blocked the number and tossed the phone to floor. They didn't say anything as Karl pressed himself back against Sapnaps chest.