It's Not Over (RusAme Story)

Chapter 32- Discovered

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

~Russia's POV~

I captured America against the wall of the rink and I grinned down smugly at her. She had been so quick to say that she was better than me at hockey, yet I had beat her easily. It was true that she was a fast learner, but she had nothing on me. Well, nothing besides shooting.

America looked up, her face flushed from embarrassment, and went to slug me in the shoulder. I easily accepted the punch, grabbing her fist from the air and carefully guiding it away from myself.

"Resorting to our old ways now, are we?" I raised an eyebrow, suddenly desiring for her to challenge me.

Her eyes grew wide at this gesture before she caught herself, smiling. "Of course," she shrugged, her expression confrontational.

I watched her, peering deep into her crystal-clear blue eyes, searching for something. I didn't know what I was looking for, but something told me it resided within her.

That was when her eyes traveled to my lips, and something inside of me snapped. I gripped her hand more intensely, all my reasoning flying out the window as I leaned closer. The closer I got to her, the more I felt the undeniable pull of attraction. I wanted to kiss her, and I never wanted to let her go. I needed her.

America's hand traveled up my forearm and that was when she pressed her lips against mine. My mind reeled, excitement, joy, and relief coursing through my veins faster than I could process it.

God, that was amazing.

I wanted to kiss her again, kiss her deeper, never let her go. I needed her because, without her, I would go back to my corrupt, empty self. Somehow America always had made something out of nothing, which was part of the reason I was drawn to her. I felt as if I wasn't a good person, but if she saw me as a good person, I would grow to see myself that way too.

Was I becoming too dependent on her? I couldn't be dependent on her— I needed to rely on myself. Relying on people had gotten me hurt, bruised, and in trouble. I couldn't trust her; I couldn't trust anyone.

It took all I had to pull away from her, and once I did, I immediately regretted my decision.

She watched me pull away from her with an expression of confusion. Realization set in as she processed what had happened, and hurt was suddenly the most evident expression in her eyes. She shakes her head and steps back from me, and the betrayal is so clear in her eyes that my heart wrenches within my chest.

She scoffs, burying her face in her hands and recoiling from me. "Why did I think you'd be different?" She asked, but the question seemed more directed toward herself than me. "I knew that you wouldn't change," she raised her eyebrows, staring fixedly at the ice. She shrugs, placing a hand on her forehead in her agony. "China didn't, and neither will you."
I paused, my heart stilling at her declaration.

What did she mean about China?

Memories from the hockey brawl over America at hockey practice resurfaced in my memory. China seemed to almost be hostile towards her, and the more that I thought about it, the more I realized that she avoided him too. What had happened between them? A more saddening question entered my mind: And why had she compared me to him?

America continued to avert her gaze to the ice between us. "I'm always trying to help everyone, but everyone looks down at me. No one understands."

I wanted to reach out, but this was for the better. There was something in the back of my mind, telling me that this wouldn't last. It wouldn't last, our dads would find out, and all this would be for nothing. I should have just kept my distance. Our fragile friendship was bound to be destroyed, sooner or later.