Our Toxic Love

@19

We're back in the Hamptons. As soon as we were finished with our classes we packed and left.

It's now 5 and I'm cooking with Rosa. Zach's grandmother arrives tomorrow.

"He's hungry." Zach walks in the kitchen with Adonis crying.

"Give him his bottle." I haven't showered yet and I don't want him to breastfeed when I feel dirty.

"Amy he's hungry." his voice sharp and stern.

"Zachery give him his bottle."

"Amy my child is fucking hungry!"

I snap my head sending him daggers. I know he didn't just curse at me especially when both his mom and Adonis is present.

"Z that's no way to talk to a woman especially the mother of your child. She said to give him his bottle why-"

"She didn't take them."

Damn, he's right. I didn't bring them forreal. I said I would pack Don's stuff but I must've left his bottles and formula. But that doesn't give him the right to speak to me in that manner.

I take off the apron, wash my hands and take my child from him.

"It would be me and your ass if you dropped him." he argues.

I mutter a fuck you under my breath and walk to our room.

Ever since Adonis' birth he has always been super protective of him. I get that maybe it's his father instincts but do not speak to me like that. Yes, I may have made a few mistakes and you haven't when it comes on to parenting but he's my son too and I'd never do anything to intentionally hurt him.

I hush Adonis and when he settles down I put him in his crib in our room and put his pacifier in his mouth and he sucks on it.

"Mommy is going to take a quick shower and come feed you, ok?"I rub my thumb on his forehead.

I kiss him and rush to the bathroom taking the quickest shower then out back in my robe.

I sit on the bed and start to breastfeed him. I hum Mama's Hand by Queen Naija while rocking him.

The door opens and closes and my eyes automatically roll when I hear who came in. I didn't look up I just continued doing what I was doing with Adonis.

"Your brother wants to talk to you."

I take his phone.

"Sis, y'all still down with going to LA right?"

We all plan to go to LA this summer.

"I'm certain that me and my son is coming. Don't know about anybody else."

"Wah you and your man have now?"
(What happened with you and your nigga now?)

"Naav nuh man, I'm single."
(I don't have any man, I'm single.)

Dating me is hard. Imma break up with you every time I'm mad.

"Gwaan play with Zach. You and Neva love talk boh single and when unuh get wull all chat affi lock."
(Keep playing with Zach. You and Neva like to talk about being single and when y'all get what you're looking for all talking stop.)

"Kyro bye."I hang up.

I hold my hand out for him to take his phone. He grabs it.

This boy.

I won't even pay him any attention. I just get up and put Adonis in his crib because he's sleeping and kiss him.

As I stand up straight, Zach holds my neck.