The Light that Wakes [Bagginshield]

Matters of Trust

Bilbo stood perched at the top of a ladder in Erebor's Hall of Records, arranging books on the top shelf of one of the many bookcases in the room. His mind was quiet of thoughts for the most part, focusing solely on setting each book in its place, after taking time to ascertain its weight, size and overall condition. This work gave him a kind of peace of mind that he only remembered finding when he had sat on his bench outside Bag End on warm nights, surveying the calm horizon of the Shire.

With such soft contemplation to lean into, he almost fell off the ladder when he heard, "Bilbo?"

It was Thorin's voice, coming from below, and it carried no reason for anyone hearing it to be startled. It came like a wave of dark silk.

"Up here," said Bilbo, trying to keep his sudden unease out of his voice.

Thorin soon appeared at the foot of the ladder. "What are you doing up there?"

"Working... I suppose," said Bilbo.

"Of course." Thorin smiled a bit sheepishly, which would have made him even less intimidating to anyone else's eyes.

Bilbo, however, felt as if a skin of thorns was growing within him from the inside out. "Can I help you with something?" he asked drily.

"I wanted to talk to you, if you can spare some time," said Thorin, unbothered by Bilbo's tone.

"Sure. Can you help me with something first?"

"I can."

Bilbo lowered a rope with an empty net at its end down to Thorin, saying "I left some books on the table right next to you. Could you put them in here, please?"

Thorin looked around until he spotted a pile of books where Bilbo had indicated, quite impressive in size. "All of these?" he asked.

"That's right. It's the last batch. Once I get them all up here, I can come down."

The net had reached a level where Thorin could easily handle it, and Bilbo expected him to fill it with the books he had prepared. Instead, Thorin planted his hands on his hips and looked up at Bilbo with doubt on his face.

"They are quite heavy," he said. "Are you sure you can pull them up?"

"Well, I have put some muscle on me since I left home, if you must know," replied Bilbo.

"Have you?" asked Thorin in a tone that sounded discernibly curious.

Bilbo cleared his throat. "Yes. Yes, I have."

"I see," said Thorin, then muttered something under his breath that Bilbo couldn't really hear and made tremendous efforts not to guess.

Thorin said nothing more and proceeded to load the books into the net as he had been asked.

Bilbo held on a little bit tighter to the ladder as he waited, having been overcome by a sudden spell of dizziness. He also preferred to return his gaze to the level of the shelf he had been working on, trying to win back at least a trace of the composure he had enjoyed only moments before.

"All done," announced Thorin soon enough.

Bilbo looked down startled again and met Thorin's clear eyes. He had expected to see something in them that would have affirmed his anxiety, some reason for him to feel like he had to keep his distance, but there was nothing there but gentleness. There was really nothing more to do than to get to the job at hand and think nothing more of it. So, with a deep sigh that he hoped Thorin couldn't hear, he pulled on the rope. Even if the bundle of books was indeed a little heavy, he managed to bring it up to his level without making a fool of himself. Trying not to take too much time, he arranged all the books on the shelf, and climbed down.