reason to live (short story) - (UPDATED)✔️

pretty little birds.

   listen, before you heard the whispers of birds, a voice so soft and luring approached. i wish, i hope you're just as true to the tune as the voice rises. approaching an unexpected, fragile plain slope. sounds so pretty, yet so broken.

i hope we can fix it.
—
  one at a time he said. don't rush yourself into things, you'll stress. yet, i look around the scattered books in dismay. i have yet to know the consequences of such action, a fool of which we see so boldly, but choose to admire so openly. something so beautiful, something so beat, something like me.

  "this one." i point towards a certain pastel book in the open aisle. wanting to know, see something so destructive in its natural beauty. he looks at my pointed finger, trying to get the specific book. i watch in patience, this was the candy that i need. the kinda kid i would become in the arms of such creation.

  the lengths i'd go to for such captivation. he hands me the book. the words bold in silver while they reflect against the light of the library's window, showing myself in the process. "thank you." we do this often, go out to the public library to find new books. he hates it, but he loves me.

  "if you grew a couple of inches you wouldn't need my assistance so much." i sigh at his quirky compliant, "you'd come even if i didn't need you to," i respond, checking out the book at the front desk. the blonde middle-aged woman greets me. "hi, Nolan." she smiles up at me. my presence is known all too well in this place.

  "hi, Julia, hows Maryanne?" i question retrieving the book back in the process. "she's doing much better, thank you for baking her so many goods." the softness in her tone makes me smile. "of course, no need to thank me. i love your mother way too much, it's just a good deed. plus me and Elliot enjoyed making them." she looks over to El.

  the two never really communicated. i never cared to ask but i'd guess it has something to do with the fact that they're not that close. "hi." Julia waves awkwardly, she's always had a fear of tall people, Elliot didn't seem to beat that spectrum and oddly enough Elliot was aware of such an abnormal fear.

   his family was close to hers, so they often saw each other, private and public accessions. Elliot was very close to her sister so they'd seen each other a lot during our high school years, he just knew her as the overprotective big sister that she was, and likewise, he never disagreed with the justification of her action, her sister was an attention attractor.

so much so, that she started to attract the wrong kinda people's attention.

  "hello Julia, it's good to see you doing well." he politely express, i dim the tension to be somewhat amusing. "thank you, same to you." the women's voice is thick and low, a mature set to her vocals that makes it satisfying to hear, something very calming indeed.
—
  i've disconnected myself from such void emotions. i no longer want to feel the things holding me back in life, i'll wait for another time to cry, or think, or try. Elliot bought me another flower, it doesn't feel like the last but it certainly doesn't feel bad.

  i admire his effort, i can only hope that he can admire mine. "you've read long enough." he snatches the object from the grip of my fingertips. i groan, lifting myself from the sofa of the living space. he creases a page from the book to note where i'd left off. "you'll sleep all day and regret it at night."

   i cock an eyebrow, slipping my fingers into his. "you'd know?" i question in sarcasm at his perfect ability to wake up so early in the morning. "mmh, i guess i'll wake you up a little early, then." he teases, creeping a hand against my waist while we walk up the stairs. my eyes start to roll at his reply.

  "i was kidding, no need to go to such hash extents." i motion with my free hand, dramatically as he chuckles in response. "i don't need parental vision sir." i lay on my side of the bed. "you're right, what you do need though, is a sleeping pill," i smirk at his lame joke.

  "you almost got me."