How they would be as a customer in a café + dating a barista
Jouno
- Oh dear
- Harasses everyone
- Harasses his partner
- Harasses his mf FOOD
- By this, I mean he sends things back, not bc he isn't satisfied but bc he can
- ESPECIALLY if his partner is on their shift, he'll be extra nasty
- "What can I get you today, Jouno?"
- "An iced coffee, with specifically 5 cubes of ice 2cm by 2cm, 1 pack sweetener, a drizzle of chocolate and 25ml of 3% milk and, oh, do you have chocolate sprinkles? Yeah, I want some of that on top, add some whipped cream too and-"
- Orders the longest thing and then sends it back because "there were incomplete sprinkles" while staring down the barista with a huge grin
- His partner is literally on the verge of breaking up with him for this
- However, sometimes he gets bored of toying with them and just orders a coffee
- He likes to observe people
- It's kinda creepy but he'll pick a seat in the corner and watch as his partner writes down orders and smiles at other people, and then gets somewhat internally offended when they laugh at the random customer's dumb jokes
- He narrows his eyes (even more, if that's possible?) at them at wonders why he doesn't make them laugh as loudly as that
- Takes it as a challenge
- Now you've got a clingy af Jouno who sticks around the desk and seduces his way into the kitchen by flirting with the manager (his partner's boss)
- His partner wants to YELL at him that they have to work, but he just places his hands on their hips and kisses their forehead and gives them the slightest hug and tells them how much he loves them, so their partner reluctantly tolerates his presence around their work
- He may not know how to cook but he smells every single ingredient and is a surprisingly fast learner so the manager is lowkey trying to recruit him bc of his undeniable talent 👹
- Overall, he does help in the end, but his partner has to put up with a lot of teasing and nastiness. Occasional jokes and cute little pranks where Jouno would place a heavily powdered donut under their nose to make them sneeze and eventually messing up the ENTIRE place
- But damn, those perfect milkshakes he made are worth it all
Tecchou
- The perfect man omg i might be heavily biased
- he is easily distracted
- Asks his partner all sorts of things
- "hey, how do they make coffee?"
- "well, you put the beans in the machine-"
- "beans???"
- "yes??? coffee beans???"
- "coffee???comes???from??beans???"
- "yes, tecch, it does u adorable idiot 🙄"
- "does that mean you can make coffee out of the beans they put in burritos and stuff?"
- "no- wait I don't think so- actually, maybe-"
- Other customers overhear the discussion and chip in and the entire thing escalates to the WEIRDEST topics
