Finding our place in this world

I promise

[Ryan’s POV]

            “You need me, Ryan.” was the first thing out of Ray’s mouth after we separated. I couldn’t actually deny it, because well, he was right. I did need him, I needed Ray so bad it hurt me. I knew he saw it in my eyes, because he reached up and touched my face shortly after I nodded. “I do need you, Ray. I need you so bad it hurts.” I whispered to him. Right then and there, everything I knew, felt, and saw was Ray. I must have blacked out in pleasure because when I came back to reality I was laying with Ray, our limbs tangled and him asleep. Glancing to the clock behind me, I saw it was nearly 3 am. Deciding on trying to get a bit of sleep, I closed my eyes and dozed off quickly.

I half expected Ray to be gone when I woke up the next morning, but to my surprise, he still had his head buried in my neck and was snoring softly. Not wanting to disturb the other, I laid still until he woke up. When he finally blinked awake, I couldn’t help but smile, he was still breath taking even with bed head. I watched him glance at the clock, dropping his head to the pillow next to my head, laughing.

“I’m so boned if Geoff finds out.” He said, sitting up, keeping the blanket pooled around his waist.

“Why would you be boned?” I asked, sitting up as well.

“You’re a traitor to the crew, Rye.” He said, messing with his hair some before dropping his hands. “You left us.” He added.

“I know.” I said, sighing as I ran a hand through my hair.

            Reaching over behind Ray, I grabbed the hair tie I used and pulled my hair back. I used to cut my hair, but after Ray told me he liked my long hair I stopped cutting it. I had intended to get it cut shortly after leaving the Fake AH Crew, but I felt like cutting it would be losing the part of myself. The part of myself that was still connected with Ray. I felt a shift in the bed and it took me a moment to realize that Ray was in my lap with his head buried in my neck.

“Talk to me, Ray.” I said, softly.

“Come home.” He whispered.

‘Is Ray crying?’ I thought.

            My question was answered shortly by the tears that followed the thought, as well as the tremble from Ray. Falling silent, I wrapped my arms around him and held him close. I wanted to return to 636, but I knew the minute I walked through the door, someone would put a bullet through my head, and something in my gut was telling me it would be Geoff that did it. It took Ray sometime to calm down, but when he did, he stood up and dressed. I stayed sitting on the bed and watched him. My eyes studied the scars on him, we all had our fair share of scars. From bullet wounds to knife wounds.

        I finally stood up and dressed, leading Ray to the front room. We stood by the front door, staring at each other. I set a hand on his face, a smile on my face.

“I promise you I will find a way to come home.” I whispered, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

And just like that, I had fallen back in love with Ray Narvaez Jr.