I'll Definitely Change This Time

Chapter 1: To This Life Once Again

'I... I... its...'

'It's...Dark...'

I slowly opened my heavy eyelids. After the shift-less lethargic feeling of a child, mixed with my drowsiness from the long sleep, my sight couldn't focus properly. I attempted to blink my eyes several times, to fix my hazy vision.

And once I regained my stable vision, I looked around my surroundings, and saw a horrifyingly recognizable place I thought I've finally escaped from. 'Th-this is definitely hell!' The past I decided to bury, all came to me as a shocking nightmare.

'Don't tell me...' I wanted to deny it. There's no way I'm back here, I tried so hard to turn away from this past! I pressed the hard bed upwards, and got myself to properly sit up in bed. 'If I'm right then, I'm positive there's supposed to be a mirror. Around here...'

When I was looking at my surroundings earlier, furthermore the familiar feeling I had, the mirror was supposed to be... "Thwere!" (There!) Gently hovering over the floor, I took a step and felt the cold surface hit my feet.

"Urgh-!" The cold feeling that came in contact with my skin, made me shudder from the raw coldness I felt. 'But, it's the same.' Somewhere along the lines, I had this inkling that was all too eerie.

And Step by step my body's skin had gotten used to the freezing temperature of the floor. The mirror isn't far away anymore so my reflection could be seen clearly now. 'A-ah...' The faltering voice I heard from the shock of reality, only made it clear. I'm not dreaming.

Soft circular cheeks.

Big round eyes.

Sausage like arms.

Plump hands.

'T-t-...ti...tis-!' (T-t-...th...this-!)

'Gahh! Not again!' I was grumbling the churning ache I felt. I gravely wanted to reject the reality I'm facing. But no matter how much I ignored it nothing was bound to change.

There was a violent rush in my muscles. I was mad! I wanted to release the tremoring drill I felt, and so I ran up to my bed in a quick pace. Trying to find something I could hit. "O-oh no...!" And not long I quickly realized the mistake I did. 'I shouldn't have done that!'

I winced in pain when a sudden cramp overcame my body from my rash, and abrupt movement. I shouldn't have just run like that when I was lacking in exercise. 'Ack...!' When I thought my face was about to meet the hard and solid layout of the floor, I was instead met with my sorry-of-an-excuse bed.

"Huu..." There was a sigh of relief when it finally processed in my mind that I, at least managed to get as far to the bed as I did. 'Should I be glad then?' there was a momentary silence before answering myself. 'No!' My Frustration suddenly came back, and I started to throw bullets of fists on my pillow.

I never wanted to be back here. Just take me back! I don't want to go with this life ever again. I barely manage to live more than five years in this house, and it all ended at six. "Ugh..." I was miserably groaning on the pillows in my hands.

"Sigh..." I should recollect my thoughts instead of whining. I won't get anywhere if I keep on complaining like this anyway. I could try thinking things that had happened through.

If I'm really worried about the life I left behind, it's better to think about the reason I died and lost that life I held onto so dearly. '.........' Did I really believe it was a good idea to think it through? What was there to think about anyway! Everything, was already obvious as it is. "It was those idiots' fault!"

Those damn idiots killed me! If you wanted to make a scene, then don't drag innocent passersby. The crossfire that occurred when I was on my way to the orphanage, took many lives when those idiots that were caught red-handed by the police, tried to institute a ruckus just so they could escape.