Anarchy - Young Royals Season 2 / Continuation

Chapter 15 - If You Got Somebody Waiting

After stumbling back late after the party, leaving Simon to be picked up by his mum, he felt full of energy. He couldn't bare going back to the party, but didn't want to sleep. The guards would have gone to bed by now; they don't stand outside his door all night, just when people are awake. 

He turned on his LEDs, and slid onto the floor, sat up against his bed. He wanted to do something, anything, that would make him feel in control again. He didn't want to be at the mercy of everyone else. 

He reached for the notebook on his desk, finding the letter wedged in the pages. He unfolded it, rereading it for the 5000th time. Simon had said that they can't control his words, but never, not once, had he spoken freely to the whole country. He was positive that he wanted this, but he didn't know how to do it. He thought of simply sending the letter, but the possibility of his family denying it was him, it felt like too much of a risk. Wille wanted it to be known that he was with Simon, that the Royal Family had not wanted him to tell everyone. He thought of contacting the media for an interview, but even that felt too controlled. This was something he wanted to do alone, and on his own terms for once.

He pulled his phone from his pocket, flipping it open, and turning on the camera. By placing his phone on the chair, facing his bed. He turned on his main light, returned to the bed, and pressed record. Without thinking, he began to talk.

"Hey. I am Crown Prince Wilhelm, in my dorm room at Hillerska Boarding School. It's about 2AM, so what better time to film this. I was-"

No, that isn't right. Wille sighed, before reaching for his phone, stopping the recording, and thinking. What did he want to say? About Simon, about Eric, his family? He took a breath, and resumed the recording. Moving back onto the bed, he took a moment, before speaking.

"My name is Wilhelm. I am sure everyone watching is aware of the video that was leaked last year. Well, it was in this room, my room. The person who leaked it, who will remain nameless, had a personal grudge with me, and without thinking of the repercussions, posted it online. I was able to deny it was me, my family said it was for the best. But I want to tell the full truth now in the hope that it will, erm, maybe fix things.

"Eric had always told me to live my life for the both of us. He had accepted his life would always be controlled, under the microscope. And he was willing to do that, he was raised for it. But, whether its always assuming I would never have any real responsibilities within the family, or just my character, when he passed, I knew I could never live up to that. And now, I feel as though my only duty is to my brother, living my life for the both of us, and that's why I can't keep this inside longer.

"It was me in the video. It was not forced, nor coerced, nor regrettable. Since coming to Hillerska..."

He paused, before sitting up, looking at the camera.

"Before Hillerska, I knew I was different from my family. No, they're not perfect, but they pretend to be. I just won't do that. I am-"

He just couldn't bring himself to say it. One word, and he couldn't say it.

"I have always felt the pressure to be perfect, to be a cookie-cutter version of my family, never individual. I have never spoken freely. And even now, I can hear my family in my head, telling me to not say any of this, to just do as I am told. But I won't. I am gay, and that is something they couldn't have planned for."

He took a shaky breath. As he blinked, a tear rolled down his cheek. He wiped it away, before resuming.

"My mother once said to me being a Royal is not a punishment, its a privilege. I am acutely aware that I would not be here now without the privilege that comes with being in my family, and I completely recognise that others have not got the same opportunities as me. But the constant pressure to be perfect, the lack of freedom, I can't accept that as a privilege. Not being able to be who I am, its suffocating.