Born to Ride

Chapter 15

I am a coward, no doubt about it. Just a plain bloody coward. There is no amount of cowardness in the world, to sum up my whole being. I just can't ever admit my feelings out loud at least not now when I don't even know what I should do. Or maybe I do, but then again I am not willing to, not until I figure out what is certain. And I can rest assured that Clover isn't and is far away from any certainty. 

Spending Bonnie's birthday in the city was far from enjoyable. I had casually suggested that we spend her birthday on an outdoor picnic. but to no one's surprise, she didn't find that idea appealing. There are times when I feel Bonnie seems so unconnected with nature, her land, and her hometown or fairly doesn't enjoy her life in the rural area. Anyway, since it was her birthday and she's my girlfriend we spent the day in the city, eating a fancy meal at a fancy restaurant. I wonder if this is normal in a relationship. To feel so disconnected from the person you are supposed to be most connected to 

Flynn gestures towards the pile of twinkles. "Austin, lighten up. You seem so out of it. Did Bonnie not like her birthday present? I bet it was the dinner idea."

I grab one of the twinkles to get my mind sinking into thought again. As I open the Twinkie, my doubts keep taunting me. "Is it normal to feel..." I trail off because I don't feel like sharing anything personal in front of Taylor. Lately, Flynn has been inviting Taylor to tag along. I can see Flynn's efforts in trying to keep in touch with her rural friends and his new city friends. "Does it feel normal not to feel connected to your girlfriend?" I try again. 

"Trouble in paradise, uh?" Flynn gives me a playful disgusted face. "Maybe she's cheating on you? or maybe you-"

I cut him off before he can finish that thought. "Very funny. Forget it." I don't want to hear that out loud because if it's said then it's real. 

"What I'm just joking. Maybe you're just comfortable with each other. " He stops to think about it. "Or maybe you are just bragging about how perfect your girlfriend is."

As he starts laughing, I get up to leave. "Alright, that is it for me."

He looks up from his phone, "Where are you going? I was just kidding."

I know. But I Have to clean my truck because my perfect girlfriend said so."  I joke placing my uneaten Twinkie in his mouth.

 Apparently, Grace, my truck was too much of a mess for Bonnnie that she made us take her car to the city. Truth be told, I had forgotten the mess Clover and I had left behind. 

***

For a strongly well-known rural rodeo guy, I obviously wear shorts when washing my truck, and believe it or not, I also wear a black pair of Crocs. After I finished cleaning the inside of Grace, I decided to might as well clean the outside. Feeling a little guilty for not understanding Bonnie, I gave her a call to see if she would like to wash the truck with me. But she said she had something better to do. I don't think I've ever seen her get her hands dirty. How do her hands look? I wish she were more laid back. 

As I bend down to dip the sponge into the bucket of water, an aggressive spray of cold water touched the back of my body. In response to the cold water that shot me, I quickly turn to see the laugh of the culprit. I find myself face-to-face with the one and only girl that gives me butterflies. Trying to speak through her laughter, she finally manages to speak, "You look like a wet mongoose, cowboy." 

I resist joining in her giggles as I bend down to finish dipping the sponge into the bucket, I try to remain serious. "Wet mongoose but still handsome, right?"

Clover lowers the hose, trying to calm down her laughter. While she's still distracted I squeeze the sponge to let the sponge's water reach her. She once again raises the hose to counterattack. Slowly, she makes her way toward the other side of the truck the hose giving me time to reload the sponge with water from the bucket, before following her to the other side. As I approach the other side, I don't hesitate on spraying the excess from the sponge. To my surprise, I sprayed the absence of the holder of the hose, which they left on the floor. As soon as I realize that I had been set up, I turn to be ambushed by the bucket of water I had used to wash my truck. The cold sensation is a stranger to my body but not to my mind. My mind is reminded of the hot summer days of the teen years of two childhood best friends. One where the guy was in love with his best friend. There were countless summers when Clover and I would wash cars or trucks, somehow we always ended up making a bigger mess of everything. 

[play Yellow-Coldplay]

"Clove! This is war." I grab the hose that was left behind for reinforcements, while Clover makes a run for it. She manages to find the sponge I left behind, but that only distracts me for a second. She then runs to turn off the hose. While huffing, clover takes a pause to wipe some of the water and wet hair that had gotten on her face. "Admit defeat, cowboy."

I lower the hose and wipe my soaking wet hair out of the way. "Clove, you win." She always does, in every argument, she somehow always wins. Maybe she just always wins when it comes to me. She smiles as she brings the empty bucket to refill it. "You know, if you needed or just simply wanted help you could have told me. I wouldn't have minded helping you out." She puts some more car soap in the bucket and starts lathering it. "Did you not like the sweet smell of your truck?"

I laugh, "Grace, had ants crawling everywhere because of your mess."

She looks at me stunted, "Since when have you minded anything sticky? You've never cared about getting messy before. Did someone say Grace was sticky? Tell me who? I'll give them a piece of my ranch mind."

I don't laugh this time, I simply give her a smile of admiration. I guess I longed to hear those words, but certainly not from her. Especially her. I grab some of the soap foam and playfully smear it on her cheek. She laughs, "Why didn't you ask them to help you wash the truck?"

I grab a towel and pat Clover's face dry, removing the foam from her face. "Because we always make a mess. Look what you did." I gesture to the mess of water around us. In reality, the reason could be far from that. Because as much as I like Clover, I wanted to wash my truck with Bonnie, not with Clover. I hand Clover a dry towel. "Go inside. I'll catch up in a bit. Let me just organize this mess." She opens her mouth to say something but I give an immediate no. "Without your help. Head inside and dry up." She pouts a bit before deciding to head inside. 

If I had her help clean, my mind will not be silenced. As I am picking up the hose and other materials that I used to wash Grace. I hear footsteps approaching on the other side and having the hose in hand I quickly and quietly sneak towards the footsteps. I use my index finger to apply pressure to the water flow, successfully soaking the approaching footsteps. "Serves you right!"

I run to shut off the water flow when I realize that Bonnie is drenched in water. "I am so sorry, Bonnie. I thought-" I trail off. What exactly did I think? That she was Clover?

"What is wrong with you? I am wearing designer and you decide to hose me. What are you? A child?" Bonnie's clothes are really soaked, so I try to hand her the dryest towel I had at hand. "Bonnie, I'm sorry. I got carried away."

"Carried away?" Bonnie's eyes started to water. "You're sorry?" She starts wailing and drops to the floor. "Do you know how much and how long it took me to save up?" I try to get her to stand while apologizing to her as she fell back when I sprayed her. "It was months."

"Bonnie, I'm sorry." I wipe her face as her tears have begun to run. 

"Well, sorry isn't fixing my clothes!"She complains

"Look, let's go inside and get you dried up. Then we can get you new clothes." She reluctantly looks at me. "Designer clothes," I reassure her.