Give Me a Reason To Stay [Kagehina]

Chapter 1: Graduation

Hinata and Kageyama had just finished having a celebratory graduation dinner with the other third years. They had left the other three -- Yachi, Tsukkishima and Yamaguchi, back at the restaurant and were headed to their respective homes. Hinata would be leaving the following morning for Brazil.

Their walk was quiet, each lost in his own thoughts. Kageyama was heartbroken that Hinata was leaving, for no one even knew how long, to go halfway across the world. But the problem was, Kageyama had never told Hinata how he felt. That he loved him. That Hinata was the most important person in his life. That the thought of him leaving made Kageyama feel like crying.

He could say it. He could say everything he wanted to say tonight. And maybe he should. Otherwise, Hinata would leave and Kageyama would be left wondering what it would have been like. He was debating. But they were almost to his house and he was running out of time.

Part of him wanted more than anything to pour out his heart to his partner. But part of him knew that Hinata needed to do this. Had to go off and make his own way. To develop, learn, get better, get stronger, and who was Kageyama to get in the way of that? If he truly loved Hinata, he'd let him spread his wings and fly.

Hinata was also contemplative. He was excited about leaving for Brazil but part of him loathed the idea of leaving Kageyama, his partner, his other half. He didn't even know when they'd see each other again. Part of him wanted more than anything to just stay and be with Tobio, to tell him how much he loved him and that he'd never leave. But the other part of him needed to make his own way in the world, outside of Kageyama's shadow.

Both young men were lost in thought, torn in two and internally conflicted, when they arrived outside Kageyama's house.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye," said Hinata, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Yeah, I guess," replied Kageyama. Then silence for a heartbeat, two, then three as they each debated what to say next. Kageyama was thinking, I don't want him to go, but how can I live with myself if I ask him to stay? Hinata's thoughts focused on, I have to leave Japan, but I don't want to leave him.

Several more heartbeats passed in silence. Finally, Kageyama said, "Do you want to come in for a while? No one's home, so we have the house to ourselves."

Hinata was more than relieved to put off the goodbye. "Yeah, sure."

They made their way through Kageyama's front door. They both took off their shoes and jackets and Kageyama asked if Hinata wanted to watch some old volleyball videos, and of course, Hinata said yes.

They spent a couple of hours watching their old games, reminiscing, recalling their three years together as rivals, then partners, then friends. They both had smiles on their faces by the time the last video was over. They looked at each other stupidly, still grinning.

But then, reality hit both of them and their smiles faltered. Goodbye was now even closer. How were they going to survive without each other?

Hinata reluctantly said, "It's getting late, I suppose I should go."

Kageyama said nothing. He just knew Hinata couldn't leave, not yet. There was so much to say, but how? How could he express everything in his heart? His love and affection. His gratitude for the man that made him what he is today? A soon to be professional volleyball player. His lifelong dream, all due to this impossibly cute and likeable redhead who pushed him to be better and better and made his dream a reality.

"Don't go," Kageyama said quietly.

Hinata barely heard, "What?"

Kageyama looked up, his blue eyes locking with Hinata's brown. "I said, 'Don't go. I... I want you to stay. I..." Kageyama ran out of words then and did the only thing that occurred to him in that moment of panic and weakness. He leaned over and planted a quick kiss on Hinata's lips.